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Should children take care of their elderly parents?
The older our parents get, the more responsibility falls on our shoulders. People who gave us life, sooner or later will begin to need support and support. Just like we once could not take a step without our beloved mom and dad. But unfortunately, elderly parents and children They do not always find a common language. An old mother can become a real burden for a busy daughter. Why does that happen?
Editorial "Site" I am seriously concerned about this topic. And especially deeply she touched the strings of my soul. A friend recently told me quite a bit. contradictory story. To describe her in great detail, I will write almost verbatim the story of a friend. In the end, I’ll tell you what I think about it.
Older parents and children Friday night was quiet and calm. Unbeknownst to anything, I languished in bed, reading another snotty book, from which I suddenly wanted to sleep. But the door of the apartment opened abruptly, and on the threshold was my husband and my mother. Sergey quickly put his mother’s bags in the corridor and walked into the room.
At first I was a little confused, because my mother had been in the clinic for a long time, and to be honest, I was used to it. But my husband stunned me with his statement: 'Your mother has been discharged, she is perfectly healthy, but she needs careful care. So I decided that Lyubov Grigorievna will live with us for some time. You don't mind?
Of course I don't! I had just moved to the capital and things were up. Good job, beloved husband, own apartment. What else does it take to be happy? Clearly not having a frail mom in the next room. In a fit of anger, I stared at my mother abruptly: “Mom, only in my life everything began to get better, you appeared!” What, you want me to take care of you all my life now? And then you don't want to go back to your village!
My mother went to the kitchen and I saw disappointment in my husband’s eyes. A few minutes later, I heard my mother cracking through things. “Apparently, it’s going to,” I thought. Not wanting to be in this chaos, I quickly went to a friend. When I got home, I found something that shocked me.
In the middle of the room was a couple of suitcases, and on them – a train ticket. The husband hung silently between the pillows of the sofa, napping. "Mom hasn't left yet"? Or are you going out for the night? he asked. Sprosonya Seryozha replied: No, dear, these are your things and your ticket. I think we should live apart. You know, I've been dreaming about kids for a long time, but I'm not sure you can be a good mom to them. Stay with your mother in the village for a while, think about it. I hope it helps you understand what's going on and come back.
It’s hard to imagine how I felt at that moment. Did my husband betray me or did I betray my mother? I really had to figure it out. So I took a vacation and went to my native village.
Editorial
Of course, it's up to you to decide which side the truth is on. But I want to say from myself that this behavior of the daughter is simply unacceptable. No matter how stressful your relationship with your mom or dad is, Parents and children need to support each other.. Without your support, they may not be able to cope. And if you find it difficult to communicate with someone from your family, keep a few practical tips.
How to communicate with older parents
I hope this article inspired you. Sometimes one phone call is enough to make your heart warmer. Put aside even the most important things and send a message to your family. Take care of yourself and your elderly parents!
Editorial "Site" I am seriously concerned about this topic. And especially deeply she touched the strings of my soul. A friend recently told me quite a bit. contradictory story. To describe her in great detail, I will write almost verbatim the story of a friend. In the end, I’ll tell you what I think about it.
Older parents and children Friday night was quiet and calm. Unbeknownst to anything, I languished in bed, reading another snotty book, from which I suddenly wanted to sleep. But the door of the apartment opened abruptly, and on the threshold was my husband and my mother. Sergey quickly put his mother’s bags in the corridor and walked into the room.
At first I was a little confused, because my mother had been in the clinic for a long time, and to be honest, I was used to it. But my husband stunned me with his statement: 'Your mother has been discharged, she is perfectly healthy, but she needs careful care. So I decided that Lyubov Grigorievna will live with us for some time. You don't mind?
Of course I don't! I had just moved to the capital and things were up. Good job, beloved husband, own apartment. What else does it take to be happy? Clearly not having a frail mom in the next room. In a fit of anger, I stared at my mother abruptly: “Mom, only in my life everything began to get better, you appeared!” What, you want me to take care of you all my life now? And then you don't want to go back to your village!
My mother went to the kitchen and I saw disappointment in my husband’s eyes. A few minutes later, I heard my mother cracking through things. “Apparently, it’s going to,” I thought. Not wanting to be in this chaos, I quickly went to a friend. When I got home, I found something that shocked me.
In the middle of the room was a couple of suitcases, and on them – a train ticket. The husband hung silently between the pillows of the sofa, napping. "Mom hasn't left yet"? Or are you going out for the night? he asked. Sprosonya Seryozha replied: No, dear, these are your things and your ticket. I think we should live apart. You know, I've been dreaming about kids for a long time, but I'm not sure you can be a good mom to them. Stay with your mother in the village for a while, think about it. I hope it helps you understand what's going on and come back.
It’s hard to imagine how I felt at that moment. Did my husband betray me or did I betray my mother? I really had to figure it out. So I took a vacation and went to my native village.
Editorial
Of course, it's up to you to decide which side the truth is on. But I want to say from myself that this behavior of the daughter is simply unacceptable. No matter how stressful your relationship with your mom or dad is, Parents and children need to support each other.. Without your support, they may not be able to cope. And if you find it difficult to communicate with someone from your family, keep a few practical tips.
How to communicate with older parents
- Don't try to change your parents. Just accept your parents as they are. Older moms and dads have long established character and habits. So you can only guide them in the right direction, giving harmless advice.
- Don't fight with your parents. Older parents are much worse at any stressful situation than you might think. Be able to change the subject of conversation and calm the fervor of your father or mother. Solving any conflict in the bud is the way to the success of any relationship.
- Have compassion, but don't regret it. Old people don't like to be pitied. They feel even more powerless and useless. If you feel sorry for your parents, you can't help them.
- Learn to forgive. Whatever childish resentment is etched in you, learn to forgive your parents. Sometimes it takes years to forgive. And sometimes children just miss this opportunity, because simply did not have time, and the parents were gone.
- Don't blame yourself. We're all not perfect. So stop blaming yourself for what you did or said. Just apologize to your parents and talk to them honestly. Any action you do sincerely will be rewarded a hundredfold.
I hope this article inspired you. Sometimes one phone call is enough to make your heart warmer. Put aside even the most important things and send a message to your family. Take care of yourself and your elderly parents!
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