Christmas trees and performances: what you need to remember parents

Christmas and new year time in addition to joy, colours, tangerine flavor — filled and that can bring discomfort. Both children and adults. How to minimize stress in children, Teens and adults during matinees and new year's performances.

Party at the kindergarten and elementary school — what you need to remember:

For parents — the party — the anticipation of joy and pride for their child, for caregivers — "reporting an event", for the child holiday, having fun and play, or stress — fear of speaking, fear can not cope with task (to forget words and so on).

The more parents and educators desire to "impress", the more load and stress the child feels.

When we are afraid, part of the brain responsible for safety, turn off the part of the brain that stores poems, songs, formulas, spelling rules. We either freeze up or start to fuss, or begin to behave aggressively. This applies to children and adults of any age.

When we are afraid, part of the brain responsible for safety, turn off the part of the brain that stores poems, songs, formulas, spelling rules. We either freeze up or start to fuss, or begin to behave aggressively. This applies to children and adults of any age.

If the child is scared, the most talented, artistic, intelligent child may forget the words, confuse the feet don't hit the notes. This is especially true even more — "good", responsible, the right of children (and children who are lucky enough to grow up in families of parents-perfectionists).

The external voltage enhances the natural sensitivity. To the sounds, scents, touches. For naturally sensitive child — the excitement, the anticipation of external loading may be excessive. In a noisy, stuffy, filled with the older (evaluate and strained) areas, the child can suddenly start

  • to sulk, to cry, to close ears (important child to take to ventilated place, give water or hold the handle under water);

  • not give himself to touch, may refuse to remove your clothing, wear a costume (not to take the time to choose clothes not too tight, which at a minimum is worn over the head, perfect if clothing leaves open the neck. can the child offer — this item we wear and this wear).

  • maybe just helplessly stand (it's important to sit down to the eye level of the child to touch the private part of the body or to hug and slowly and quietly to tell me what I need to do);

  • child before and after the party it is important to offer to go to the toilet;

  • child — even "experienced actor" — during a party can run up to mother beg on his hands (it is important to take on hands, hug, then carry out to the stage). He runs on the "podsadku" in the safest place it is important that this "place" was the host, kind and truly safe;

  • the kid may be frightened of Santa Claus (his voice, unfamiliar image) — it is important to "show" pictures of Grandparents, to say that he is good, he loves all children, which sometimes speaks loudly that everyone could hear;

  • when the child meets the critical eye of an adult — he feels the insecurity.


Critical look at those parents for whom the speech of the child — confirmation of their status as "good - bad parent". It is important that the child does not lay the responsibility for our self-image. He has his own tasks in life, we have ours. If we want for any reason to tell the child — it's embarrassing! — it does not matter to the child, and to our vulnerability.

Activities in unfamiliar places (clubs, concert halls)

All that was written above and it is still... Hugging the child and submitted with the child that he is under the rainbow or around it, a glowing ball or sphere is a magic invisible ball of my father's and mother's love.

Take wet wipes, water, try to arrive early to avoid the holiday area, to find a bathroom.

The same brain that responds to danger — can cause even the most kind and timid child to growl, to bite, to fight. Imagine a dog that is dangerous — it repels itself from perceived enemies. So strange "sobachkoy" the way children sometimes prostragivajut around themselves in a safe space. It is important child to hug, hold hands or arm. To remind you about the "ball-Konon" love.

If the child does not want to move away from the adult, does not want to undress quickly — give him a chance to be with us as much as he needs. We remember that each person has their own speed and own agility.

It is possible to acquaint the child with other children and after a few minutes to step back.

Be sure to negotiate with your child where you will meet. It is important, when a child is moved a great distance, and looks back at us — to give a sign that you see it (wave). You can come up with a secret sign — I'm with you. To play — to check, does the child's phone, home address, name.

Home activities with the company

It is important with a child of any age to consider — what things, toys he is ready to share what it is better hide. To speak the script of the holiday, give the responsible mission (to spread out swipe, carry guests to the table or the tree).

It is important to remember that the child will watch closely how we treat other people's children, the first attention is always to your child. Talking with other children — hand on the shoulder of his. Otherwise the child will begin to attract attention in a way that we don't like.

If the child has its own place at the table — this place hotel do not offer or coordinate beforehand with the child.

"Teenage parties"

Teenagers often think that it is unnecessary to "kids" event, which they tightened by force. And even if they themselves enjoy, can demonstrate involvement and resistance.

They may not want to present the parents (remember that adolescence is a time of separation). We can say, "I know you're an adult, but I want to look at you. It's always a joy." Words — "for the parents the child is always small" — forget forever!

All we talked about the brain that responds to danger — for teenagers even more important than for kids. The level of anxiety, panic, fear above them, despite the "great experience" hormonal surges provoke stress.

We remember that control of texts, notes, coordination of movements is reduced. And the vulnerability of self-esteem, vulnerability to criticism manifested or perceived, self talk is huge.

Teen excitement may fall on the parents, the classmates are trying to do not emotionally involved.

We can offer water, sometimes to give a little piece of candy or sweetness.

After the matinee — it is important that the teenager is not heard in our words irony and sarcasm.

We sincerely say that we enjoyed, not comparing. If PTS want something to criticize — 80% support, and that notice of Mature, 10-20% constructive criticism, end with going out for coffee or homemade tea.


At home with the kids the day before to play "matinee", to speak loudly, louder than usual to include music, poetry, eyes closed, standing on one leg, the tickling adults.

A child can give a family a bracelet, small doll, to sew clothes kind of symbol, which would be nominal — I'm with you. (Be sure to warn the child, even if the bracelet breaks — I still with you)

For matinees, it is important to come (any family member). For a child of our loving gaze is to support and beam. the road to the outside world. The child clings to our mind. Only important, of course, that he was not critical.

The caregiver can rarely give support to all children.

When someone else's baby is crying and peeping mom — allowed to come and quietly talk to him or bring the child to the attention of the caregiver.

If we are not able to come to the matinee, tutor or teacher betray the letter (with drawings) in which words, images, emoticons (support and the feeling) I'm with you. A letter the child can put in your pocket.

For an only child in the family — public events can be harder. During and after the party the child can periodically "off", tired. Sometimes after a party and a sweet table of the child it is useful to pick from the garden home to rest.

In the evening all who were not present at the matinee tell what a wonderful actor, as was similar to a hare, it was great to watch as a kid — singing, dancing (standing on the stage, silent, smiling).


9 ways to be good parents, doing nothingWhat thoughts give birth to healthy children

If the child gave "sweet gift" and candy he can't quickly pour candy. Instead, put something small a toy. Or offer your child to choose from the proposed options — what he'd like instead of candy.

Parent — always admiring, supportive, proud of the viewer. The role of the critic is always in the world there. Our children are the most-most-most. And we are the most-most-most for them.published


Author: Svetlana Roiz




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