We're in a hurry to live...



Once on the train my neighbors in the compartment was a family with two children, boys of three and twelve. Immediately after planting, began a long process of pulling out of the bags all important and needed in the way of things.

They had to be on the road for about forty hours, so such important and necessary things have been tight. Road clothes and shoes, packages of food, packets of chips, bottles of water, beer, soda. Crossword puzzles and mystery novels for dad, women's novel for mothers, comics for older son... And the little plastic box in which lay three plastic animals for kid.

The family got active. They all the time something chewed, drank, was constantly sick from the countless food packages, several varieties of cheese, different types of sausage meats. They brewed a batch soups and instant noodles.

Only the kid did not take part in it. After receiving his portion of yogurt, he was sated and started all the way. Because playing him was nothing. Toys him have somehow forgotten. And the parents blamed each other:

— I has been shopping, I cooked, I in the way things are going... I began to turn, but you could recall? — my mother said.

— Whenever I remind you, I came home from work late, the car in the garage put, even Peter called... — justified by the Pope.

And the child all night has received criticism and odergivaniya: "Sit down... don't touch... Why take a... Put the... you like this..." And because in the absence of toys, tried to play everything — shower curtain, garbage bag, Shoe brother, dad's cigarettes, mom's purse. After all, when a child with nothing to do, his occupation becomes to interfere with adults. And I thought — as indicative of this situation as it often exists in the relationship between parent and child! How often parents in the hustle and race of life "forget" about existence, values and the importance of children in their lives. How often we miss them, do not find time for them, not pay enough attention to them. And they are deprived of the full attention and love, begin to distract us from their bad actions generated by us.

Indeed, many things in life seem really important. It is important for us to make a career. Important to earn more money it is important for Us to communicate with friends and relaxation. It is important to look good and be healthy. Important — professional growth, communication with nature or house for sale.

Each of us has our own hierarchy of values — a certain sequence of these vital "importance". And we, again, rarely think that in the first place, and that on the second.
But this is not a realized hierarchy of values and forces us to allocate your energy, time and attention as required by our "importance."

And we distribute our energy, time and attention — always skewed in work, in earning money, in the achievement of material objectives in a purchase is needed or socially important things.

And we find time for some important things. Wydawanie to Shine dishes (this is important!), to talk for hours with a friend on the phone, on a picnic with friends. It is important for us to take guests to their arrival to lick the entire apartment (it's important that will think about you!), feed them the most delicious food — it's guests!

And the child — just get in the way in this important endeavor.

And the end of this important business. We are in a hurry to visit. Then you need to do Laundry. It starts the show... And what happens in the series with Donna, Louise or Jose Ignacio is sometimes more important than what's going on with my child. Sometimes the score of a football match, read a football review to find out why favourite football team fell out of the Premier League — more important than what happens to the child and why the child, for example, fell from the children with whom I communicated.

Moreover, we live in such a fast pace that we sometimes have no time to change roles. And don't come home mom and business woman, who dryly asked: "homework done?", as would be interested in the implementation of the plan. Home comes the Pope, and the chief, who commands: "March to bed!" This sometimes completes all education. Because once!
And we, in the pursuit of all these "importance" often lacks the time, attention, energy on the child. To communicate with him. To Express his love, to be with him, enjoy him, listen to him. To stop and see what happens to the child how he feels. To Express their feelings, to caress it.

And in this rush, when we have no time — we used the parenting techniques that don't require time. Because to yell, slap and shove into a corner requires very little time. Much less than to listen, to understand, to understand, to speak, to support. So to educate faster and easier — in our complex, overloaded with chores and worries of life is important.

It is easier to demand than to ask. Easier to yell than to explain. Easier to ban than to teach them to act properly. Easier to punish than to understand what causes the bad action of the child.
And we are rushing through life, we hurry to live, to cover. And in this race we have no time to stop to think and realize what is really important in life? What it really important?

I think many parents still don't realize the importance of our parent role and scope of our responsibility. The importance of our global role in the lives of our children.
Because the child is the most important guest in your life. This individual, whom God has given to you at the time you to help it grow and take root in this world. So you helped him become such that he was able to survive in this world. To achieve success. Become a happier person.

The baby is the prize that you were awarded. Child — the expression of the highest trust of the God who gave you the life of another little person that you helped him become big. Truly a BIG man, not small and obedient executor of your orders. And what could be more important than this in life?! How can it be secondary — after TV series or talk on the phone? How can you not find time?

Moreover, we in this rush and race of life do not have time to realize (or forget!), that how we treat the child as appear to him — will return a hundredfold to us in old age. We actually now, every day or create their own joyful, stable, happy old age or loneliness, abandonment, apoderando.

We realize that there will come a time when we have the children switch roles, we will become weak and feeble and it's their time to take care of us, feed us, give us attention, time to help us. to support us. If they want to do it? Or I will answer you with your own: "I have no time, not to you." Or dismiss: "I have got a week ago was, what to visit you every week'?" We have now generated this importance of attention, care about people. But if we do not find them time and energy, why they will have to find them for us?!

Maybe we need to stop'? To slow down, to return to awareness of their life, the relationship with the child, in life priorities and values.published

Source: vk.com/love_mama?w=wall-20249656_855423