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Hysteria in children: what to do
In the family it is necessary to develop some rules that will help to minimize the effects of children's tantrums. They will not give hysteria as a way to achieve the desired, to gain a firm foothold in the reactions of the child.
Mother might resent, to break, to cry, but only when her child is in a calm state. Some believe that the ideal mother is always calm, patient, full of wisdom and understanding. But the perfect mother is an unattainable image and stereotype imposed on women by society. Such creatures do not exist!
All people, without exception, experience negative emotions. Including in relation to their own child. It's okay! And if the mother will give yourself the right to do something she could control them and not to depend on circumstances. After all the hysteria of a child creates such a tension, which is extremely difficult to withstand. So mom, do not recognize a right to negative emotions, as a rule, at one point, goes to the hysterical child, unable to withstand this tension and falling into my own tantrum. And what could be sadder than the spectacle of a crying baby and screaming is not his voice mom?
This is a fundamental situation that needs to realize and accept the mother, which child is prone to tantrums. Mom complains and is indignant only when her child calm. During a tantrum a toddler mom observes a neutral mood. While her face should Express resentment and anger, but only love and understanding. After all, her baby is now bad.
The most interesting that a child after some time will be able to learn not to respond to outbreaks of discontent happening at mom's. If he begins to understand that sometimes his mother is outraged and even yells. No problem; you just have to wait. The mother and child give each other the right for negative emotions. Only such a policy can overcome the tendency of the child to the tantrums.
Great additional effect that both the child and mother allow each other to Express negative emotions, is the lack of a sense of guilt. Becomes unnecessary apology for the fact that the mother raised her voice for a misdemeanor. She has that right. And the child is placed in the same situation when he can no longer take on the role of the offended.
Often you can find advice to leave the room if the baby in periods of age crises begins to behave inappropriately, cries of achieving the desired. This method is good if suitable child, if he really calms him down, eliminating the pretext for manipulation. But some children do not fit. Such a child is left alone in the room, loses orientation and ceases to understand where it all began. From this, his behavior becomes more violent.
In this case, it is impossible to leave the child alone. But it would be better if all the family members will leave mom and baby alone and shut the door. Mom will get hysterical baby in her arms and pressed closely to him. She'll say to yourself, "I'll wait for this condition, I'm not going to say anything and think! I'm waiting for the child to calm down".
Mom screams: "Stop! Shut up! Calm down!" Her child is in this state hears nothing. He's just not able to hear. It's all in the power of the hurricane raging inside of him. He can only feel the irritation of a beloved mother and her acceptance of this condition. The child can sincerely try to please her, not taking his fortune too. But it's a dead end road.
"All the causes of hysteria out only when the emotions subside". This is the second rule. No explanation what happened, what happened to the toy, why mommy doesn't buy candy until the child is in hysterics. And, of course, no action. Mom is not looking for a toy, do not buy candy until then, until the baby calms down. She takes him in her arms, stroking the head, wiping the tears (maybe mine, too) and waiting for the child to let off steam.
And then act according to circumstances. Considers that it is necessary to buy candy — buying, don't think that this is not necessary — buys. It is only necessary to justify their actions in a calm voice, with an emphasis on the futility of tantrums, but taking it as a whole. For example: "you shouted, and you and I would so have bought this candy. I would explain that you very want it. I don't understand." Or: "one may shout, but the money in your wallet will not increase. For the candy you have to pay. And what was the point in shouting if I with all my desire still can't buy it".
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Join us in Facebook , Vkontakte, Odnoklassniki
Source: facebook.com/pereval.org/posts/975436245826716:0
Mother might resent, to break, to cry, but only when her child is in a calm state. Some believe that the ideal mother is always calm, patient, full of wisdom and understanding. But the perfect mother is an unattainable image and stereotype imposed on women by society. Such creatures do not exist!
All people, without exception, experience negative emotions. Including in relation to their own child. It's okay! And if the mother will give yourself the right to do something she could control them and not to depend on circumstances. After all the hysteria of a child creates such a tension, which is extremely difficult to withstand. So mom, do not recognize a right to negative emotions, as a rule, at one point, goes to the hysterical child, unable to withstand this tension and falling into my own tantrum. And what could be sadder than the spectacle of a crying baby and screaming is not his voice mom?
This is a fundamental situation that needs to realize and accept the mother, which child is prone to tantrums. Mom complains and is indignant only when her child calm. During a tantrum a toddler mom observes a neutral mood. While her face should Express resentment and anger, but only love and understanding. After all, her baby is now bad.
The most interesting that a child after some time will be able to learn not to respond to outbreaks of discontent happening at mom's. If he begins to understand that sometimes his mother is outraged and even yells. No problem; you just have to wait. The mother and child give each other the right for negative emotions. Only such a policy can overcome the tendency of the child to the tantrums.
Great additional effect that both the child and mother allow each other to Express negative emotions, is the lack of a sense of guilt. Becomes unnecessary apology for the fact that the mother raised her voice for a misdemeanor. She has that right. And the child is placed in the same situation when he can no longer take on the role of the offended.
Often you can find advice to leave the room if the baby in periods of age crises begins to behave inappropriately, cries of achieving the desired. This method is good if suitable child, if he really calms him down, eliminating the pretext for manipulation. But some children do not fit. Such a child is left alone in the room, loses orientation and ceases to understand where it all began. From this, his behavior becomes more violent.
In this case, it is impossible to leave the child alone. But it would be better if all the family members will leave mom and baby alone and shut the door. Mom will get hysterical baby in her arms and pressed closely to him. She'll say to yourself, "I'll wait for this condition, I'm not going to say anything and think! I'm waiting for the child to calm down".
Mom screams: "Stop! Shut up! Calm down!" Her child is in this state hears nothing. He's just not able to hear. It's all in the power of the hurricane raging inside of him. He can only feel the irritation of a beloved mother and her acceptance of this condition. The child can sincerely try to please her, not taking his fortune too. But it's a dead end road.
"All the causes of hysteria out only when the emotions subside". This is the second rule. No explanation what happened, what happened to the toy, why mommy doesn't buy candy until the child is in hysterics. And, of course, no action. Mom is not looking for a toy, do not buy candy until then, until the baby calms down. She takes him in her arms, stroking the head, wiping the tears (maybe mine, too) and waiting for the child to let off steam.
And then act according to circumstances. Considers that it is necessary to buy candy — buying, don't think that this is not necessary — buys. It is only necessary to justify their actions in a calm voice, with an emphasis on the futility of tantrums, but taking it as a whole. For example: "you shouted, and you and I would so have bought this candy. I would explain that you very want it. I don't understand." Or: "one may shout, but the money in your wallet will not increase. For the candy you have to pay. And what was the point in shouting if I with all my desire still can't buy it".
P. S. And remember, only by changing their consumption — together we change the world! ©
Join us in Facebook , Vkontakte, Odnoklassniki
Source: facebook.com/pereval.org/posts/975436245826716:0
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