Cosmic jokes

5 photo. YaPovskogo nothing is alien to them :)
Being an astronaut is not so easy. You need to have excellent health, training and be ready to work constantly at maximum capacity and make decisions in a totally hostile human environment, where the slightest mistake can lead to disaster. Nevertheless, nothing human is alien to the Conquerors of Space and they are exactly the same as all of us, like if possible to make fun of his colleagues or TsUP`om. And we have to admit that some of these drawings are obtained for the glory.

Vodka in space

July 17, 1975 a significant event happened - there was docking in space ships "Soyuz-19" and "Apollo." But in addition to important political overtones, and remember this meeting due to a rally, the organizer of which was known for his sense of humor cosmonaut Alexei Leonov. After the hatches were opened, and exchanged handshakes American astronauts were on board the Union Leonov calmly handed them tubes with the label "Moskovskaya vodka & quot ;. Then, he explained stunned Americans that according to the old Russian tradition, before sitting down for a celebratory table (as far as this concept is applicable to the conditions of weightlessness), it is necessary to drink.






Broken to mind astronauts sip from tubes ... which actually turned out to be soup - Leonov vodka labels pasted after the start. According to Leonov, realizing that it is not vodka, Americans have noticeably depressed, and the world still few believe that astronauts drank it soup, not something stronger.

April 1

April Fool's Day (also known as April Fool's Day) is almost always a reason for what some small jokes among astronauts and TsUP`a. Here, for example, April 1, 2010 the crew of the ISS sent in this photograph MCC and escorted her assurances that TsUP`u absolutely nothing to worry about, as the astronauts "have brought sunglasses and sunblock."




Another story is dated 1991. April 1 is one of the oldest journalists who wrote about space exploration, Vladimir Bezyaev conducted live-Union radio station "Mayak" with a crew of Vladimir Titov and Musa Manarov. On the occasion of laughter astronauts decided to play the radio. But in the end was played PCO.

Musa Manarov reported that docked to the station, "truck", and when he opened with Vladimir Titov passageways, it became clear that the number on the transport ship was some strange, not the factory. "There is an unknown number of natural numbers", - reported Manarov. Head of MCC probably listened to transfer from the very beginning, because of what the world has started a commotion ("To the station docked with an unknown object!"), And PCO immediately required to implement Telephoto strange numbers.

Wonder cucumber




Went on an expedition to the orbital station "Salyut-6" Vladimir Lyakhov and Valery Ryumin secretly snatched in the pockets of suits in orbit smuggling - cucumber and orange. And in the first report showed the world the cucumber, allegedly raised in a greenhouse of the station. Botany gone mad: even before the plant ovary did not give, but here are a cucumber. It asked him not to eat and began to think, how to deliver urgently miracle cucumber on Earth. And only a week astronauts admitted a joke, showing and orange.

Kosmoprank

Author, perhaps the best in the history of space drawing, astronaut Owen Garriott has become, a member of the crew of the second expedition for the American space station "Skylab".




When "Skylab" once again made contact with TsUP`om, on Earth ... clearly heard a woman's voice. The next conversation was leaked stories:

 - Hello, Houston, this "Skylab". How do you read me?
Long silence.
 - Houston, you hear is "Skylab"?
 - I hear you, but I can not recognize the voice. - Uncertainly answered by an agent - Who's communication?
 - Reception Houston. I have not talked to you for so long. Bob, are you? This is Helen, the wife of Owen. Boys so long not to eat homemade food, I decided to bring them lukewarm. Reception.
Around the operator Bob had already gathered a crowd.
 - Acceptance, "Skylab". I need someone to pinch me on the leg. Helen, it's really you?
 - "Yes, we recently flew over the forest fires in California. Smoke covers a lot of territory. And, yes, Bob, sunrises are just adorable.
Suddenly, a woman's voice became vzolnovannym.
Okay, I have to go. I see the boys flies to the command module, and I was not allowed to talk to you. See you later, Bob!
 - Bye, bye ... - quietly murmured Bob.

After that the world heard the loud laughter of three astronauts "Skylab". As it turned out, Garriott took with him into space recorder, which his wife talked a few pre-entry. When MCC got in touch with the orbital station, Garriott was waiting at the transmitter with a voice recorder in hand. It later emerged that the operator Bob was with them in the "share" - Garriott rehearsed with him this whole dialogue. Perhaps he was afraid of possible mental state of another.

Excess crew

Generally, the crew of the second expedition "Skylab" definitely had a very interesting sense of humor. The astronauts returned to Earth September 25, 1973. November 16, 1973 to the station launched a new crew. Opening the hatch, the astronauts saw in front of him ... three silent figures. One of them is "practiced" on the cycle ergometer, the second protruded from the "vacuum pants", and the third in an elegant pose sitting on the toilet.




It turned out the previous crew took three old overalls, filled them with garbage, and has attached to it, "head", made out of paper bags. Since the team had a lot of work, while they were not to harvest figures. Astronaut Edward Gibson later recalled: "I felt like they look at me, checking everything that I do, but not providing any assistance. Horror ".

Eleutherococcus B

This story was told to the general public cosmonaut Georgy Grechko:

"In space you need each day for exercise for two hours. To do this, we have special costumes. These suits wear out quickly, so they take flight in a few. And so, once again, in a removable suit for physical education, we found polutoralitrovye jar labeled "Eleutherococcus B" (part of the energy). We, of course, this jar was opened and found that there brandy! We collectively have made specific bet that if every day to drink 8, 5 grams of cognac, then it will last us for the duration of the flight. But we were wrong ... and could only drink half. The rest just did not work out of the jar to pour! The fact that the liquid in weightlessness zero has the same weight as the air, and therefore if it is not squeezed, it is simply mixed with air and is transformed into foam.

The remaining polflyagi we decided to leave where we found it and. At the same time to see the reaction of the crew that we will succeed. Imagine our surprise when they returned to Earth and told us that they drank cognac! We are all in wonder - how? It turned out they came up with an original way. Here it is, who could be useful ...

One of the astronauts went up to the ceiling and took a jar lips, and the second at this time hitting him on the head. As a result, the first goes down and the liquid inertia poured into his mouth.

Then they changed places. As they told us: "In addition to higher education need to have more and at least secondary consideration." It's hard not to agree with this opinion.

everything is taken here: astronomy-ru.livejournal.com/364164.html

oh I've dreamed of becoming an astronaut is

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