663
Anecdotes and stories
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I come now to the lab - are lessons lying on the floor with laughter admin, and nearby stands and looks at him with uncomprehending eyes and embarrassed girl, the others sit, as if nothing had happened.
Shake administrator, ask: - What happened then? Five minutes of waiting until he prosmeetsya, then, unable to stand, repeat the question. After a while, he tearfully said:
- Suits me she (pointing a shaking finger) and says: "Look, it's my computer hangs." I go, I see the phrase «Continue (Yes / No)?», Tell her that a computer asks - to continue it or not. She: "And what to say to him?". Me: "Well, tell him - yes ...»
Then she bends over to a computer, he brings his lips somewhere between the gap and drive holes in the fan, and earnestly asking insistent voice said: - Yeah! ..
* * *
Read in the new issue of women's magazine «Lisa» ...
How to win the sympathy of the chief;
How to move quickly through the ranks;
How to be the favorite worker doing nothing at work;
And other secrets of oral sex ...
* * *
The real question Inet conference Putin:
Good afternoon. Why in Russia, a student who receives a diploma, must go into the army, losing valuable time? With that regard, that over the lifetime of such changes may occur in the technology that his knowledge will become obsolete, and it will not be needed as an expert in your field?
Answer Vladimir (TM):
Do not worry. The Russian technologies for two years, nothing will change. We have over seventy years of these technologies has not changed. Serve quietly. Russia will wait.
* * *
For reliable protection against the abuser, do the following:
1. stunned rapist. To do this decisively come to him and greeted him politely, hit a knee to the groin.
2. Not letting the rapist came to, tkni his finger in the eye, and umbrella - in the groin.
3. turf writhing rapist over his ears and struck him with the toe shoes in the groin.
4. Ignoring pretended groans rapist grabbed him by the hair and hit his elbow in the groin.
5. Bite the rapist on the cheek, then carry out a powerful header in the groin.
6. The half-open mouth pain rapist shove fingers skrebani mucosa, expand and heel Sadan him in the groin.
7. Catching a moment, embedding a rapist on the nose. The freed his hands smelled of embedding sideways.
8. Lift rapist sprawled over his eyebrows. Spit him in the groin.
9. Turn on the back of a rapist. Make sure that the groin is no longer at the rapist.
10. Seek new rapist.
* * *
Question Online motorists:
Check the oil level, the dipstick dry! But oil pressure tidy shows that normal and light oil gorit.Komu not believe probe or bulb?
Answer:
Pulled out his h ... First, I measure ruler - 15cm., And his wife says - feels - 5cm! Whom to believe - the wife or product line?
* * *
What distinguishes the morning srednestaticheskogo knowledge worker of the second half of the 20th century by an employee in the morning of the 21st century?
20th century
Morning drive to work: metro, tram, trolley, bus - everyone reads.
Arriving at work - everyone is asleep.
21st century
Morning drive to work: metro, tram, trolley, bus - all asleep.
Arriving for work - all reading online.
* * *
I come now to the lab - are lessons lying on the floor with laughter admin, and nearby stands and looks at him with uncomprehending eyes and embarrassed girl, the others sit, as if nothing had happened.
Shake administrator, ask: - What happened then? Five minutes of waiting until he prosmeetsya, then, unable to stand, repeat the question. After a while, he tearfully said:
- Suits me she (pointing a shaking finger) and says: "Look, it's my computer hangs." I go, I see the phrase «Continue (Yes / No)?», Tell her that a computer asks - to continue it or not. She: "And what to say to him?". Me: "Well, tell him - yes ...»
Then she bends over to a computer, he brings his lips somewhere between the gap and drive holes in the fan, and earnestly asking insistent voice said: - Yeah! ..
* * *
Read in the new issue of women's magazine «Lisa» ...
How to win the sympathy of the chief;
How to move quickly through the ranks;
How to be the favorite worker doing nothing at work;
And other secrets of oral sex ...
* * *
The real question Inet conference Putin:
Good afternoon. Why in Russia, a student who receives a diploma, must go into the army, losing valuable time? With that regard, that over the lifetime of such changes may occur in the technology that his knowledge will become obsolete, and it will not be needed as an expert in your field?
Answer Vladimir (TM):
Do not worry. The Russian technologies for two years, nothing will change. We have over seventy years of these technologies has not changed. Serve quietly. Russia will wait.
* * *
For reliable protection against the abuser, do the following:
1. stunned rapist. To do this decisively come to him and greeted him politely, hit a knee to the groin.
2. Not letting the rapist came to, tkni his finger in the eye, and umbrella - in the groin.
3. turf writhing rapist over his ears and struck him with the toe shoes in the groin.
4. Ignoring pretended groans rapist grabbed him by the hair and hit his elbow in the groin.
5. Bite the rapist on the cheek, then carry out a powerful header in the groin.
6. The half-open mouth pain rapist shove fingers skrebani mucosa, expand and heel Sadan him in the groin.
7. Catching a moment, embedding a rapist on the nose. The freed his hands smelled of embedding sideways.
8. Lift rapist sprawled over his eyebrows. Spit him in the groin.
9. Turn on the back of a rapist. Make sure that the groin is no longer at the rapist.
10. Seek new rapist.
* * *
Question Online motorists:
Check the oil level, the dipstick dry! But oil pressure tidy shows that normal and light oil gorit.Komu not believe probe or bulb?
Answer:
Pulled out his h ... First, I measure ruler - 15cm., And his wife says - feels - 5cm! Whom to believe - the wife or product line?
* * *
What distinguishes the morning srednestaticheskogo knowledge worker of the second half of the 20th century by an employee in the morning of the 21st century?
20th century
Morning drive to work: metro, tram, trolley, bus - everyone reads.
Arriving at work - everyone is asleep.
21st century
Morning drive to work: metro, tram, trolley, bus - all asleep.
Arriving for work - all reading online.
* * *
