Suslikov apocalypse

And he was damned first gopher hamster. And forever marked his first hamster callous Bun blow to the head, and said to him, "Come out, bitch." Blackened ground squirrel in his serdchishke and lishaynyh balding sandpaper also blackened and filled with anger and hatred. But greed and zlopukosti he and his missing.
And hissing like burnt scrambled eggs in a frying pan, found in the desert gopher black manhole and crawled under the earth, and hid there.
It stretches under the ground while viscous, lost its flavor gum shades of waste oil. And there is no joy gopher, even the smallest, and there is calm, and leave no color, no flavor holidays can not know him.
He wandered the maze of black basalt, and his eyes, forgotten sunlight to bulge from their sockets and glaze, and turbid as divorced water anise. And dirty claws on its paws still growing and their squirrel gnaws at times, and then suffers from diarrhea.

He swaggers and mutters: "I'll show you all!" Just in those words? For the show, and something he had nothing, and that that is - would only laugh.
Great anger filled serdchishko gopher, and he grinds prostheses and constantly gnaws the roots of the World Tree. Bitter juice of the roots as cinchona bark as a basic knowledge of quantum physics, but gnaws roots gopher! He spits, tormented, but gnaws! And swells, swells, swells! And then shit, shit, shit (ibid, underground) and remains in the same thin and shabby!
What is the World Tree pathetic attempts gopher? His roots are immense, and none gopher, even cursed forever, unable to bring him at least some damage. Only empty-headed stubbornness keeps the gopher and chew constantly, and puffing, grinding dentures in malice, but it is all vanity.
And so it at least ...
Fold one heavenly dirty solitaire layouts. Four aces over sixes will fall, and in a drinking bout will be at this time dancing joker ...
And like the ringing of an alarm clock, feel gopher in his gut call vague, saying to him: "It's time!»
Crawl on the ground gopher pale, and his eyes lifeless okinet blooming landscape, and under the gaze of his skukozhatsya leaves, and the sun became turbid, and household waste will flow in rivers.
And then come all the tribes of the human to the last battle! The faithful will wear white chef hats as a sign of commitment to the great buns; Other well sovraschёnnye pale ground squirrels will gnaw dry stubble crooked teeth, sticking in the eye of your neighbor. Pitiful is the kind of Suslikov armies, and they will cover the shame of advertising banners, tying them around his loins. Ridicule on them persistent and faithful, and confusion upolzёt Suslikov army, leaving one gopher. But he did not notice, and possessed by greed, puffed out his whitish, covered with sparse hair stomach.
And cried gopher pale pathetic voice: "Give me all the buns of the earth!»
Grin right and cocked jauntily cocked their chef hats, will say to him:
 - On!
And flying in a gopher buns innumerable flock, like muskrats seasonal migration to the south, and the gopher ohreneet pale, and start screaming
 - More!
Usmehnёtsya good human host and say:
 - Pzhalsta!
And add.
Gopher same eight will roll into their brains are small, and threw wildly to eat!
And not eating even a small fraction of the abandoned him - burst !!!
And the sun will shine again, and purified from the contamination of the river, and be confounded skeptics and priniknut timidly to Plyushechnoy grace.
Truly, I say, will be so!