After meeting the parents of the groom, my mother said that she would not give me to their family, so now I doubt it. Bashny.Net

In some families, this is what happens: daughter listens to motherAnd the son is his father. Each parent gives the child advice for the future, which can be most useful in life. And normal, people live, grief does not know. This approach to parenting is also possible.

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And there are families where all authority is assigned to one person: father or mother. And already this owner or hostess decides how the family will live and where, in general, to move. This option also has enough supporters. So are the critics. So which of these two approaches is better? Or maybe you should build a family according to some other rules?

My mother and I have had some difficulties in communicating since childhood. You see, she's a strong woman and she wants everything to be as she says. Especially when it comes to me. The brothers, in turn, were engaged in the father: he taught them various male affairs, took them on campaigns. And my mother and I are stuck on the fact that the hostess in the house should not be lazy, which means you, Olya, have a new homework. It always does.

I love my mom, but when you only get positives, jokes and gifts from your dad... Opinion is formed by itself. My brothers absolutely agree with me. They fought with my dad more than once or twice. Because he used to swear at them when they did something wrong. They have a very good attitude towards their mother. That's our family.



I was used to this attitude and even thought that everyone was doing plus or minus the same. But the girls at school said they had a different, more traditional model of parenting. I remember being surprised. But it did not betray much importance. Well, what to do, everyone lives as comfortable as he is.

After graduating from school, I entered the institute. Believe me, I know how cunning and lying boys can be much better than you. I'm pretty sure of that. Because my mother literally lectured me on the subject. She wanted me to take care of myself and not succumb to male charms, probably until the age of forty. Ha ha. No wonder I met my fiancé in my first year.

We dated for a long time. Don't think about it, I wasn't afraid that my parents would find out about Andrew. We're not a cult, by God. Just parenting and fears about my future. In fact, I am a youngest child and a girl. Even my brothers wanted to know more about my boyfriend, and they were one of the first to know. In general, this was not surprising.



Before the wedding, I told my parents that I didn’t want a big party. It is better to take this money and go with your loved one on vacation. Longer. To have real positive emotions, not strained smiles for guests. It's rational, isn't it? But my mother, as always, went against it. And it'll be awkward in front of relatives. And I'm going to blame myself for not even wearing a dress.

Then my mother wanted to meet Andrew’s parents. They live in one big house, all together. Andrey also offered me to live there, but I said I would think about it. And what, there is a lot of space there: three floors, each family has a separate kitchen, bathroom. The way out is also separate, so this is not the case when you will have to see your husband’s relatives every day or, especially, cook for them.

In order to give something to my mother and, therefore, get her consent, I went to her meeting. We all agreed to sit together at the same table. Future relatives, however, are. Dad agreed, and the brothers refused, and said they would always agree with my decision. Thank you for that.



On the appointed day we arrived for a meeting. Everyone dressed up, even bought some gifts. We were warmly welcomed and invited to a large and generous table. In general, my feelings slowly dissipated. But that was just the beginning. Things only got worse and worse.

All evening my father-in-law joked, added to the guests, entertained. In general, he acted like a friendly host. My mother-in-law, on the contrary. Behaved like a frightened grey mouse. When she opened her mouth, her husband only criticized and ridiculed her. And her children behaved the same way. It's a nightmare. Well, at least, my Andrei was engaged in kebabs and, for the most part, he was not visible at all. Until the father-in-law remembered his youngest son and called him to him.

He offered a toast to us, to our strong family and future prospects. But then the mother-in-law also wanted to take the floor and... Andrey interrupted her. And he interrupted not awkwardly, but with knowledge of the matter. It was as if he had done something like that many times before. Not even an eyebrow. Then my mother stood up and said it was time for us to go home.



The father-in-law, of course, began to stop her, asked her to stay and so on. But then my father supported my mother. He said he, and all of us, was ashamed to be with people who so disrespected their mother and wife. And they wouldn't want me to do that. Which means they don't support the wedding, and we have to go.

The father-in-law wanted to start justifying himself, but then he thought and went somewhere deep in the yard. Andrew’s brothers followed his example. And only Andrew took me aside and asked what was going on, what was wrong with my parents. I said we should go home. And we'll talk to him tomorrow when the passions subside. He agreed, but it was clear that he was completely perplexed.

No one said a word to me on the way home, only my mother asked me if I agreed with their decision. I said I needed to think. The next morning I wrote to Andrey that I needed to take a little break and decide what to do next. Because the wedding is a serious matter and there should be ideal conditions for it.



But to be honest, I don’t know what to do. I love Andrew and I want to be with him. But that scene in his house... I really can't understand why they were all behaving like that with his mom, is that normal? And then what, could I be in her place? I don't want that for myself, I don't want it at all. But to disrupt the wedding because of this... Help me, maybe I'm just paranoid before I get married.