Several classrooms tales))

1985. I had to serve in the army and restored the institute. One spring my mom pripahali me to work my grandfather in the country. Himself wonder how I agreed, but drove. He sat on the train, which carried recruits. There were about 100.
In the vestibule I met with them and, while smoking, instructed the "sons" service. Interestingly, I was dressed the same way draftees - all old and unnecessary. Out at one station - they are part of the military, and I'm a grandfather to the country. As soon as I walked away from the car, there was a cry:
 - Uh, damn it ..!
 I go on - you never know who shout! But I caught up with the two sergeants and a white ruchenki taken into operation ... I struggled, swearing like a trooper, but had to surrender power. In the ranks, Major asks you, say that the hell ...? I try to explain that I am a grandfather to the country food ... and listen to the answer that for people like me, in the army there and giving, and grandfather ... and everything else that make me a man, too, there. An instructive lecture was spiced powerful portion of the mat, but I was not in debt. Said the major, in the sense that I am ready to join the unnatural sexual relations with him, his mother, father ... When I got to his ancestors 7th knee to major came at last, that something was wrong ... He announced the roll, I It was unnecessary ...
 Believe me, it was the most severe stress in my life. A little over the army is not busted!

***

Nostalgia, damn ...
... I got into the habit once the local Homeless about our subway to play the harmonica, daily bread, so to speak, to earn. The repertoire is plain, but diverse - from the song Crocodile Gena and Murka to march by Mendelssohn. It is, nevertheless, good fit into the interior, and become as ordinary as kiosks, vendors, and other attributes of any self-respecting subway.
 Coming late from work recently by the aforementioned object, and vaguely noticed that something was wrong. So. Homeless man with great inspiration and placement plays a hymn now Russia. Nearby are three nehily dressed decent man with a hearty, happy by this life-faced person in the hands of each bottle of beer not cheap, and sing along with the jangling discords:
 - Sooyuyuzzz nerushimmyy respuublik svooobodnyh ... -and so on through the text.
 dopel refrain us to triumph kommuniiiizma vedeeeet ...
 They stood, paused, gulped a beer, and one took a deep breath and penetrating way:
 - Blyaaaaaaaaa, a country destroyed ...

***

The story happened to me. I'm at home with a small year-old daughter, the summer heat. I must say that my dad is a hunter and a child, I used to see the various attributes of hunting ... Then the doorbell is a neighbor, and says to me that three days ago he went to see his parents live next door, but they were not home, and he leave us a duck, it took my husband, and now I would like to take it away. I invite the neighbor's apartment, opens in prihozhke closet and saying, "Where is the duck?" Begins to spread an old, dusty boots, jackets for trips to nature and trash. Neighbor silently watching me.
I take a stool, get up on it, climb in antrisol the ceiling, which houses the instruments and all sorts of things, and I start to get on to the trash covered in dust and ask a neighbor to help me, he silently takes me all this, and I continue to impose "Where This is a duck? " And then the neighbor so plaintively tells me, "Maybe in the fridge to see?" Silence, I silently go to the refrigerator take out from there duck, give neighbor goes, but I put popolam, I'm looking ohotnichyu duck decoy ... A neighbor then long to me I watched anxiously until he raskazal my husband that this is my daughter pereklinilo as a real hunter. Cmeyalsya long ..))

***

Long ago it was 10 years ago. I'm going to the subway, I got on an escalator going up. In front of me a man, who looked well, very well-dressed, personable, and a rather big size.
And in front of him in 2 steps girl-athletes in sports jackets with the word USA and fluttering in English. Suddenly one looks up, looking something up, stumbles and falls back. A guy it somehow managed to pick up, put on a step in front of him. She turns around, says - «Thank You.
A man was standing, standing, standing, standing, standing, standing. Then he says, - "Ah! Garbage! & Quot;