You sad shit, not a modern artist

You sad shit and a plagiarist, and not the contemporary artist if:
  • Exhibiting everyday objects, things from garbage dumps, rotten fruit or other crap in frames or boxes, "making them the most works of art." This was done a million times before you.
    • The proposed "text instead of images" - well, there is writing on a piece of paper, "There is nothing written," "against all" or something, witty replacing the image. It's fun for young designers. Exception - the inscription "What you see is not a work of contemporary art," notarized.
      • are using their facilities faces of politicians, pop stars, pornomodeley, combining face the salaries of icons, classical paintings, abstract paintings and things like that. This technique invented beach photographers end of the century before last.
        • draw or somehow portray something that you think is "shocking" (well there, "ass fucking baby") . All this is now causing or vomiting, or yawn.
          • make objects or images from feces, urine, blood, semen and banknotes. This shit is already eating - and not one time.
            • You use signs literally. Well, there is put next to the carcass of a sheep carcass of a bull, two embryos in the bank, boiled cancer, lion, body of a nun, and all that stuff, and call it "Zodiac." This technique never funny and fed up even before you were born.
              • Draws a terrible Mickey Mouse and Lenin's ridiculous dress of swastikas. These cloakroom style "depict the good bad and vice versa" got, like any mechanical technique. Unfunny also portray the green monster and called it "Gioconda". It happened once at the crest of a madman of genius - and never will. All other variants are also applicable.
                • Trying to get scale, "bigger is steeper" - well there, painting a building in blue, Elbrus envelop green latex scatter throughout the city millions of images of Mickey Mouse. Firstly, it is made, and also a million times. Secondly, in the course of these experiments, it was found that the garbage, repeated million times or increased in the same proportion, it becomes very large garbage, but does not cease to be garbage. And, thirdly, leave these tricks advertisers - it's called "aggressive marketing" and "spam", and not "modern art».
                  • to insult someone's feelings, real or perceived. For example, doing a bunch of crap 33 different consistencies and call it "The Age of Christ" - and then fought back from the Orthodox community that wants you to feed your own good. This technique - called insult "work of art" - and went midges. The only situation where it is at least some interest - offended when someone really dangerous. Try mogendovid shit on the Israeli Museum of Modern Art, or draw a cartoon of the Prophet Muhammad. But in fact, even if you for this tear, event in world culture is gone, and the premium you will have to rely except Darwin.
                    • show bare ass, publicly copulated and etc. This art is not as well known as tricky word "exhibitionism". Read about it in the handbook on sexual pathology. If you are not excited at the same time, it is still not art. Spare faith in humanity.
                      • Kushan in public shit, drink piss, burned himself nipples with cigarettes, cut off something, and so on. It's certainly cool, but art is not, as is the usual masochism. I will say more: even if you are in the name of the latest sincerity kill yourself apstenu, bloody mark on the wall will not pose a significant artistic value.
                        • complicates the viewer access to his creation - well, there, cover statue of cloth "to groped" gives to see the picture in the hole, "and that certainly bent." It govnopriёm.
                          • invites the viewer to participate in the creation or destruction of a work of art, and call it "performance" (well there, expose stencil and offer to paint or to the finished painting mustaches paint on ). It is trite and boring.
                            • Just tell everyone that you're gay (lesbian), and on that basis alone demand that you immediately recognized contemporary artist, or at least an interior designer. Previously, it rolled, but now a lot of competition, with ascended among gays and lesbians, there are those who really know how to paint, sculpt, and interior designers. So catch there is nothing more.
                              • The same thing if you tell everyone that you are a disabled person, a fighter with a bloody dictatorship, ethnic or religious minorities, endangered tribe, and so on. d. There is also considerable competition and competitors - is quite complete artists.
                                • You use cheap symbolism, particularly numerical, political as well as religious and national painted. For example, takes an allegorical statue depicting the tenth month of the year - with the Slavic face and slash - and plugging it in exactly one thousand nine hundred and seventeen pins, and then name it "October 1917". If you can not understand why, read the dictionary with the letter "A" - about "allegory." So, this is, first of all, is not new, and secondly, these are your modern allegory for some reason need a long tedious decryption, and it already had enough.
                                  • Just You pay a lot of money earned by the sale of vodka / colors / tomatoes / Chinese feather or taken from Pope / mother / lover / mistress, and begin to bomb the unfortunate brain man in the street, appearing needlessly every five minutes in the airwaves and on the covers of magazines, sharing creative plans.


                                    Author: krylov

                                    via krylov.livejournal.com/1625651.html