Big Trouble

The sky shimmered gems Stars. Forest silence broken only by the crackle of twigs in the fire. Even nocturnal animals was afraid to break the virginity of the moment.

 - Hello, handsome - if not a beautiful mezzo-soprano who uttered it, it was possible to jump from the unexpected greeting.

 - Oh, you're f, g. Frightened. Worthless so sneak. I usually smell of people from afar.
 - I do not people - she smiled rather slyly. She looked amazing. I mean, it was something to shake. And despite the fact that, in general, a figure she was slender. You could even say fragile. Long legs worthy of the goddess, to the thigh were hidden boots of soft leather basilisk. The upper half of the body was covered with less. Leather jacket barely hid two hemispheres, eye-catching respiratory-forth motions. Even silvering ring in the navel, on a completely flat stomach, could not distract the eye. Short skirt could not take into account. The whole combination of complex geometric shapes crowned with a shock of straw hair, gathered in a high ponytail.

 - Who are you? Witch? Ali Muse?
 - I troll.
 - Come on! Trolls are big and scary.
 - Thanks for the compliment. Trolls - yes, I troll. Troll - not necessarily terrible.
 - A! Yes. Something I heard. Like, once you have green hair should be.
 - Ha! I laugh! Well, who in our time talking about the color of the hair of a lady! You have to ask about the age of the witch. They change it as they want - a girl enough to laugh, sat close to the fire.

 - And who are you so beautiful? Also not a man?
 - I - dwarf - a girl's mouth fell open and his eyes widened. Her pupils were reflected flames. Yes, in these green whirlpools can drown. Dwarf hardly looked away. He was very high for the shorties, growth, black, close-cropped hair. He was dressed in a simple linen shirt and plaid kilt.

 - As far as I change my sclerosis, gnomes growth will be smaller.
 - Well, I'm no ordinary dwarf. I have little opportunity to change its appearance. And size.
 - Wow! Rubber dwarf. The first time I see this.
 - In principle, I and family name. Although they called me Vanya.
 - A strange name for a Scotsman. And my name is Angelina.
 - It is something connected? Also, it is not a common name. Or do you have so accepted?
 - Walks this bike that my grandmother with the angels that sinned. That's me and called. Although family name is Angela. They say to me more appropriate. And the pope called Cosmos. Angela, I Kosmovna.
 - Strange you trolls. Such names are given.
 - Normal, a Greek name. Sam-what? Scotsman with a Russian name.
 - Actually I have Scandinavian roots.
 - Why put on a kilt? Sodom?
 - Who to call? I tore his pants. People drove me into the woods. I had to scare them. I strongly increased. Here's pants and cracked. With bare ass, I walk in the forests are not used to. Here I met and the Scot. We just sat with the ogre, literature discussed. And here comes one in a kilt and sword.
 - What is the ogre?
 - Usually so green. Kelt. Taranis was his name.
 - Taranis himself?
 - No. It was named in his honor.
 - Who?
 - Org.
 - A bit slower. You orgom discussed with literature? They're stupid.
 - When it is hot - yes.
 - A Kilt where?
 - Well, I'm telling you. Word for word, began to discuss what we do not immediately notice. It seems a mere mortal.
 - Who? Org?
 - No! The Scotsman. He said that the immortal just. Taranis tried to prove that he is a simple man. And the pathetic way: "Highlander, Highlander!" Well, he bit off his head.
 - Highlander?
 - Org! Are you listening attentively? Tell me, is your natural hair color, by chance, not blond?
 - No, I do not remember. And for what purpose are you interested in?
 - So, just like that. In general, with Macleod turned ugly.
 - How Macleod? You've lost me.
 - How does what. Already no how. Scot so called. Org which head bitten off. This storm then began. Well, I did the Celts and dressed, what would somehow keep warm. He became even when his sword Mahal, I was hooked. Since hole remained. Here it is straight. In the left side. It does not heal anything ...

Angela was gone a long time in thought, digesting izlivshuyusya information on it.

 - Nevermind. You still have not said why you named Ivan.
 - Papic my Loki, named so because I'm the youngest. At that time he was fond of Slavic literature. Song of Wise Oleg, and stuff like that. Birchbark home naprinosil ...
 - Your dad - Loki?
 - Well yes. A! No. Not the Loki. It was named in his honor. Joker my dad. Only when he was born, he alienated a joke ...
 - Stop. I've had enough. Here you clearly explain, so better be silent.
 - Do not like it - do not listen - Vanya pouted and moved away from Angela. Lips inflated unnaturally hard, and looked like a duck's beak.

 - It's not that they do not like. Interestingly, though - Angelina said in a conciliatory tone, - but once you tell ...
 - I did not get that? Let me explain again. When we Taranis sat by the fire, came to us MacLeod.
 - Highlander? The kilt? And his name was like?
 - Who? MacLeod called him.
 - No. That's his name. And the name?
 - A Thor knows ...
 - What is Tor? It is here where? All. Knotted. Kilt, so the kilt. I was here a question arose. How can you increase it? All at once, or in parts?
 - Look, I do not really like to talk about it. I and so all relatives teasing - Ivan looked into the maelstrom of green eyes, looked at the soft oval face, on the invitingly open lips ... Angela Kosmovny relented and went.

 - I can fly, I can parts.
 - And what parts? - Angelina's eyes narrowed slyly.
 - Miscellaneous. Can enhance the arm, can only fist.
 - A leg?
 - Can and a leg. I can reduce the head. I look silly. What used to deceive the enemy.
 - Oh really? More stupider? And yet?
 - What else? Can the shape of remake. That was like a wolf, a dog or a bird kind. What I have been a dog! Hachiko was called ......
 - What kind of bird?
 - Well, the chicken there. Or cormorant. The penguin can.
 - And you know how to fly?
 - Do not. I'm afraid of heights. Like a giant I pretend to inflate all. Then I look down from the top, and the head starts to spin. Once even fell. That was a rumble!
 - The hedgehog can turn?
 - I did not turn around. What am I, a werewolf? Not to face it to me. I just form me. Why are you about the hedgehog?
 - About your hole remembered. When you puffing, she starts to whistle fun.
 - Yes, she zarastёt. For me everything is on the dog heals. Fast. For a year - or two. As a child, my brothers twisted into a ball and feet kicking. The game they were such. Bruises went in just six months. If you do not often played.
 - Strange you have relatives. And even some limbs can increase?
 - What kind? So everything listed. My legs and arms ... And I do not have a tail.
 - Vanya, I understand that you were the youngest in the family, but think again. I guess when you played football, the head often fall. I'm talking about your kilt all think.
 - Well I explained. I took him to the Highlander, MacLeod ...
 - And under the kilt?
 - I am to him under the kilt did not look.

Angela has built his beautiful eyes to the sky. Deep breath. From the cut on the jacket looked out two balls. Then he slapped his forehead with his hand.

 - Mosquitoes tortured? - Ivan asked sympathetically.
 - I do not bite. I have blood on the basis of silicon. Mosquitoes do not like it. Silicone I get. You wee doing?
 - Wee? Recently there. When I'm running and breathing hard. Hole so funny peeps.
 - Ivan, you really that stupid? Or just my trolls?
 - Mom says, "the fool who foolishly" - Ivan frowned.
 - Okay. Let's go the other way. Do you have a girl?
 - I do not hobnob with mortals.
 - Virgin what-if?
 - What's that?
 - You slept with women's creatures?
 - Have them fall asleep? Spinning all night, probe, preventing sleep.
 - Yeah. All clear. I'm all drenched, while with you truth knocks. Boys and girls have sex. To do this, they need the presence of one little thing. If you could increase this Thing ...
 - A! You mean it! About Agriculture? That increase it? I, on the contrary, do less and hide inside. And you can catch. Or come ...
 - Oh, you troll! - Angela screamed and ran a gnome, throwing off from itself a few clothes.

The thunder woke all for miles around. People in fear of looking at the stars falling from the sky and talking in a whisper: "Evil spirits indulge, staged an orgy." Only alchemist-astrologer in the castle prince said, raising his finger to the sky: "The fall of a meteor. It can be a symbol of the upcoming symposium alchemists ».
My. ©

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