Mom is more interested in her dogs than her own grandchildren, she doesn’t care about our family at all Bashny.Net

Many modern adults know what aggression on the part of parents is . When everything comes at once and at some point the children simply start to rage. Today you can’t even shout at a child; this will immediately be followed by condemnation from friends and neighbors. And before, a child who committed a particularly large amount of mischief knew perfectly well that one way or another, his father’s belt would await him. And there were no concessions.



Some say it was better before. More discipline, smarter and healthier children. Occupational therapy and symmetrical punishments turned boys into men, and girls turned into real women. Unlike today's younger generation, which some consider weaker in spirit and even more so physically. Although, as many people as there are, so many opinions. Scientists, on the contrary, believe that each subsequent new generation is not much, but still smarter than its parents. At least, no one charges water cans for transmissions with Chumak or Kashpirovsky anymore.

What is aggression? My parents always treated my brother and me with a special love that only they understood. Daily exercises, dousing, kneeling on buckwheat, even a belt - all this was in the order of things for us. We weren't a religious family or anything like that. It’s just that mom and dad have always been straightforward people. And they demanded obedience, respect and absolute dedication from their children. Traditional values and patriarchy were a natural fit.



As a child, I didn’t think about it, but then it dawned on me: since I’m a girl, and the youngest in the family, my brother got it a lot more than me. And often it was because of me that he received a couple of extra blows from dad. “How is it that you don’t know where your sister is at this time?!” I’m sure that’s why he left our family at the age of 17. No, he rather ran away. After all, even now Kolya doesn’t want to have anything to do with us, not even with me, although so many years have passed...

Then my father passed away. But for a different reason. The lungs failed. He, either from nerves or simply out of habit, smoked like a locomotive, a pack a day. Or maybe more, I can’t say for sure. This habit got him. Although he did not touch the bottle at all and forbade his mother. And how she loved him! I went into mourning for several months and lost so much weight that I looked like a hanger. Even the voluminous suit with which she tried to hide her weight loss did not help. Again, her brother’s departure was not something special for her; she paid almost no attention to this event at the time.



My own family Now I am an adult woman myself and I have two small children. My husband and I live in his apartment and I have almost forgotten my past life with my parents. I don’t remember entire time periods, to be honest, it just slipped my mind. Although I tried to remember some events in order to piece everything together... Well, God bless them. Mom stayed to live in our old apartment and still feels very good. Dad left money behind, and it’s also worth considering the house, which is for rent on the outskirts of the city. Previously, it was a summer house, but we were lucky with its location and at the moment it is bringing in a good profit.

As I already said, my brother and I were raised in a traditional way. This is how I grew up, and I can’t help it. No matter what happened in the past, I always invite my mother to family holidays with my husband and children. I go to visit her from time to time. I bring gifts and do shopping. I force my husband to help if she needs to move something heavy or do some minimal repairs. And she takes it for granted.



Soulless mother But on her part we see absolutely no return. Mom just sits at home, takes care of her three dogs and sometimes calls me to ask how I’m doing, and even more often to check what’s happening in my family. I feel like some kind of soldier to whom the general calls and from his master’s shoulder “pleases” me with the fact that one of his dogs needs the help of a veterinarian. This means we must come and take the animal to a specialist. No “thank you”, no “goodbye”. Must.

Although the mother herself does not behave like a traditional parent, her grandmother is also so-so. And I won’t say anything at all about her role as mother-in-law. Nikolai and I started everything from scratch and no one helped us at all. Nevertheless, now we are standing on our feet, raising children in difficult times. What about mom? Even though she has the ability to help us financially, she would rather buy more food for her pooches than extra chocolate for her grandchildren. What an extra one, what am I talking about. I love it.



What is aggression? Moreover, she also criticizes my husband and me for the fact that we are deliberately making her grandchildren weak. Imagine, your eldest daughter is 5 years old. And that if we continue like this, they will grow up good for nothing. So they better have more discipline. In general, he advises me to raise my children the way my brother and I were raised in our time.

And when I remember that my mother’s “favorite” son personally left our family because of such a policy, my mother just starts yelling and hissing. And then he theatrically bursts into tears, not forgetting to reproach me for the fact that it was because of our childhood insults that my father did not become so early. Although I personally cannot see any connection in this.



Lately I've been having a hard time tolerating my mother's attitude towards me. And I feel like I don't deserve this kind of treatment. Maybe I've grown up and finally become callous. Or maybe my upbringing has begun to weaken. But something must change, I'm sure. How much time and nerves can you waste on an elderly person who has never valued you in his life? Isn’t it more logical to pay attention to those who are here, who are nearby? It doesn't matter if we're related or not, it's just not healthy to continue like this. Let the dogs help her, and I won’t be involved in this anymore. My brother was right all along. This family was always doomed. I just didn't want to see it.