4 rules for parents to help children succeed

Tips for parents is now everywhere, but the majority are not worth anything serious. How to take part in the fate of their children as efficiently as possible and to help them get everything they want? The site publishes a selection of the best tips that met us on this subject.





1. Work on soboyEto overlooked by the authors of many books for parents - and it is perhaps the most important.

Want to have happy children? Then do not forget to live happily. have happy parents happy children and depression in parents' cause behavioral problems in children. And it's not genetics. And what? First of all, in the ratio of work and personal life.

In one poll, which involved thousands of families, children were asked: "If we could fulfill your desire about one parent, what would you like?" Most parents believe that their children will be asked to spend more time with them. But no: in the first place was the desire of children to their parents are less tired and less strained
Your stress - not just your stress. Studies show that stress weakens the intelligence of the parents of children, depletes their immune system, increases their risk of obesity, mental illness, diabetes, allergies, even a deterioration of the teeth.

2. AvtonomiyaDa, mother and daddy, too carers of children: your children flourish when they have the space to be an individual. children are better off when they can make plans, or at least when their word means something. Even the sense that they themselves chose their punishment. This increases the motivation to follow the rules.

Scientists, University of California and other institutions have found that children who themselves plan their time, set goals for the week and evaluate their work, developed prefrontal cortex and other areas of the brain that help to better cognitive control over their lives. These so-called management skills help children to discipline yourself to avoid distractions, to weigh the pros and cons.

And do not charge too much children specific lessons and get involved in every moment of their lives. Unstructured game provides them a lot of positive effects: learn to work in groups, to share, to negotiate, to resolve conflicts, regulate emotions and behavior, voice their opinion.

3. KommunikatsiyaV mainly at the family dinner, say words like "Take your elbows off the table" or "Please pass the ketchup." But you can better take advantage of this time.

The first thing you need to remember that parents talk at the table two-thirds of the time. And this is the problem. So your first goal - to turn this ratio, let the children speak more. Second - it is every day to teach their children some new way. Weight studies suggest that one of the major determinants of success in school - a vocabulary.

And still incredibly useful to develop a family strategy. Sit down and say, here are ten of our main values. Here's a family we want to be. We want to be a family that did not quarrel all the time. Or do we want to be a family that goes camping. And so on.

You do not have a family dinner? It is necessary to start. Recent studies show that children who dine with their parents are less likely to start drinking, smoking, taking drugs, get pregnant, commit suicide or suffer from an eating disorder.

Other studies show that children who like to eat with their parents, a large vocabulary, better manners, healthy food and higher self-esteem.

Dinner does not fit into your family schedule? Optionally, it is supper. And not necessarily every night. As the Columbia study, even once a week - is a big difference.

4. SoobschestvoChto affects your children better than you? Their peers. We often speak of "collective pressure", but studies show that this effect is often positive. That's what this bill says Science:

Children who feel vulnerable to "the pressure of the collective" as it turned out, getting excellent grades, do well in high school and go to university. Subsequently, they have an excellent relationship with best friends, partners and parents. < br />
On the one hand, the influence of peers encourages children to engage in risky behavior, but on the other - forced to achieve better results at school, increases their attention to the views of teachers and parents and to the opinion of the general public. And those who have demonstrated to the opinion of the invulnerability of the company, estimates were lower. Their motivation to study was not strong enough, because they do not care what people think around.

In addition, children need not only parents and brothers and sisters. Studies show that the presence of adults who children trust (not a parent), increases the feeling of support and life satisfaction of more than 30%. And if you choose who the adult, the body of research shows that it is best that it was my grandmother. Children who spend time with their grandparents, are more prone to cooperation and compassion, better able to cope with the school, they care more about the lives of others.

And finally:

Love. It is not enough simply to guide, protect, promote. Children 47% are more likely to feel close to those who regularly shows his affection.

They - the new generation. They have a chance to be better than us, so give them this chance.

via ideanomics.ru/?p=4343

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