Top seven most funny dialogue pilots and controllers from the life Bashny.Net

Probably, an air traffic controller - this is one of the most tedious and arduous professions, but as you can tell from these real conversations between pilots and aircraft dispatchers, the burden does not affect the sense of humor last!



1. Manager: "TWA 2341, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees".
TWA in 2341: "The center, we are at an altitude of 35,000 feet. What kind of noise is it? "
Dispatcher: "Sir, you ever heard how noisy can be 747 when he faces 727?"



2. Unknown aircraft, a long time waiting for permission to take off: "How did I get bored!"
Control of ground movement: "Last transmitting, identify yourself immediately!"
Unknown aircraft: "I said that I'm bored, and not that I'm stupid!"



3. DC-10 failed to properly brake during landing, which should lead to a longer movement of the runway.
Manager San Jose: "Try to cool, turn right at the end of the runway, if possible. If you fail, merge onto Highway 101, turn right at the traffic lights and go back to the airport! "



4. The pilot of Pan Am 727, waiting for permission to take off in Munich, heard the following dialogue.
Lufthansa (in German): "Earth, when we allowed the flight time?".
Land (in English): "If you want to hear the answer, you have to speak English".
Lufthansa (in English): "I am a German, flying a German airplane on in Germany. Why must I speak English? ".
Unknown voice from another aircraft (with a beautiful British accent): "Because you lost the bloody war!". 44,568,176



5. Manager: "Eastern 702, taking off is allowed, keep in touch on the frequency 124.7".
Eastern 702: "Manager, Eastern 702 is on the rise. By the way, since soared, we saw some kind of dead animal at the end of the runway ".
Dispatcher: "Continental 635, off Eastern resolved after 702 communications during the flight on frequency 124.7. You have received a message from Eastern 702? ".
Board Continental 635: "Continental 635 takeoff allowed, Roger, and yes, we heard the Eastern ... already inform our caterers" .



6. The German managers from Frankfurt Airport is known for its incontinence and sharpness. They think that all pilots must not only know the number of the output, but also how to get to it without assistance. Once the pilot Pan Am 747 heard the following dialogue Frankfurt controller and pilot Aeroflot 747.
Aeroflot 747: "Frankfurt, Aeroflot 747 leaves the runway".
Plot: "Move towards the exit Alpha 1-7".
Aeroflot plane 747 leaves the main track and slowing down.
Land: "Aeroflot, you know, where are you going?".
Aeroflot 747: "Stay Connected Earth. I'm looking our way ".
Land (with arrogant impatience): "Aeroflot 747, you've never been in Frankfurt?".
Aeroflot 747 (coolly): "There was a double in 1944, but it was dark and I did not land" .



7. During the movement of the London Gatwick Airport US Air crew wrong turn and stared straight into the United 727.
Angry woman manager started yelling at the crew members: "US Air 2771, where the hell are you gathered? I told you to turn right on a track Charlie! You turned right on track Delta! Stand there. I understand that you find it difficult to distinguish the C, D! "
Continuing to yell at the crew already embarrassed hysterical voice: "You ruined everything! I need forever to fix it! Remain still and do not move until I will not tell you! Wait for instructions for half an hour. I want you to do exactly as I say and when to say! Do you understand, US Air 2771? ".
"Yes, ma'am" - humbly replied the pilot.
After this conversation, the air reigned absolute silence, no one wanted to get under the hot hand of an angry manager. Tension increased. At this point an unknown pilot broke the silence: "I do not accidentally been married to you?".