10,000 needles Bashny.Net

In an era of shortages in the developed socialism there was an irreplaceable position in any enterprise - supplier. As a rule, it was clever to get, who scoured the country and by crook threshed, begged, gnaw, beg, embossing, etc. etc. consumables for their production.

About the procurers heard since sister, my good fellow by the name of Sergei worked in the garment enterprise procurement officer and was wound on the back streets of Motherland, taking the factory for everything - threads, fabrics, accessories, oil for sewing machines, machines themselves and, of course, needles.

When he was active the collapse of the Soviet army in particular and the whole of the USSR as a whole, is the sister of Sergei was carrying another batch arhidefitsitnyh needles, sewing plant safely dead, left without orders. Switzer-motoristok dismissed on indefinite leave without pay - Read fired equipment is sold quickly cunning Vietnamese at the price of ferrous scrap and spacious workshops organized warehouses for stuff on legs Bush to spare parts, and even placed a couple of "samovar" for aluminum smelting exclusively for export to the Baltic States. Anyway, who remembers the wild 90s, the shudder.

Being a caring brother, and a gentleman in fact, I met Sergei sister of the supplier on the railway the train station, so frail lady is dragging on itself ten boxes of 1,000 needles each. Along the way, "pleased" the latest news about her unhappy fate sewing plant.

Having started a tear and spoke very sincerely and firmly, sister asked Sergei to take a needle in temporary storage "until better times." It's right, do not throw out the good ?!
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But to drag such a heavy home, too, the prospects are not very pleasant. As head of the special department of the division, Sergei scored anybody unnecessary needle into his office and forgot about their existence.

And were those needles on the farthest shelf gathering dust in the closet and forgotten by all. Thankfully, that is not rusted, because of the waste tank armor made - nothing in the country of the Soviets did not vanish under the planned economy, everything in it went.

And then everything like Chekhov, "If a gun hanging on the wall, it must shoot!" After a few years, it's time to shoot, and sewing needles.

Being a sociable person, and despite the serious position of "terrible special person," Sergei had a subtle sense of humor and was always the soul of any company.

So, once in the bath has a very solid company - the military prosecutor, the judge, and a local businessman Sergei à la New Russian who strongly favored the military and often let insolvent debt products in the division, so that the soldiers in the garrison could eat regularly. (please do not forget the wild 90s - the times were, God forbid)

Warm company was leisurely conversation about the meaning of life, the degree of warming periodically not only visit the steam room, and a permanent infusion of fluids inside the relevant organisms. Gradually came the dispute about the superiority of the market economy over the planned system of national economy.

Naturally the "new Russian" pressed forward to the main argument is that the market will regulate everything on the fact of the establishment of equilibrium between supply and demand, and even give the opportunity to earn good money smart man initially at a maximum gap of demand over supply. A planned economy - archaism, which ruined the once great Soviet Union, turning its population into paupers and notorious people, completely unsuitable for normal and full life.

The judge and the prosecutor, and the choir in turn argued that Sia inhumane practices, for creating chaos, excitement, panic and uncontrollable price hikes, as well as prerequisites for the abuse, the burst of banditry and corruption.

The dispute became hotter arguments of the parties were tougher opponents relentlessly pushed into fist-term developments.

Sergei tired of watching the warm company unraveling, and ceases to be a languid evening and he took the floor.
 - Guys, good to argue! Market - this is the same market where traded two fools! One wants to sell more expensive, and the second is to buy cheap and everything is based on a simple rule: "Lie neighbor get profit"! And in normal planned economy can provide everything to the penny, but with the proviso that the case will hold true professionals, not amateurs obese dropout. For example, in our division of 10,000 troops and I have a special department is respectively 10,000 needles. As much as you need. None more and no less! On the one hand - it is good to all enough. And on the other hand is remarkable - there is overproduction that then dispose of superfluous or written off as useless! And it is such a darkness - acts of reconciliation commission, hell get a signature. In short, a madhouse! Therefore, it is better to have everything on the nose, with the shortage of fuss and no need to clutter up warehouses in excess. All well and full order reporting.

I said and went to the steam room. And when he returned, he found a company in the same poses as the left.

Sit peasants, but keep quiet. Brains creak, digest the information. Each of his thought. The first merchant opened his mouth.
 - Why do so many needles, Sergei? Clothing repair, or what ?!
 - What clothes? Under the nails to drive, if a person in the battle of chicken or have question ... you never know how people themselves in combat show ?! This practice is still in the 37-year exceptionally well-proven.

Issued another batch of Laje, drove merchant in atypical for bathhouse pale face and again keep quiet, just after the steam room sipping beer.

There is already the voice of the public prosecutor filed.
 - Do not drive, Sergei, what needles under the nails ?! Absolutely crazy or what ?! There is no such laws.
 - The peace and the law can not, because the medieval barbarism. But under martial law, needles under the nails - the most it! Very progressive action, I tell you.

Even the prosecutor fell silent and thought hard. Can really a gap in the law is poorly or codes read when he studied to be a lawyer.

Here the judge has boiled over.
 - Garbage all this ... Do not believe it!
 - Do not garbage! Reporting a voice that my office is exactly 10,000 sewing needles! Who does not believe, though I can show now.

"New Russian" jumped almost to the ceiling.
 - I do not believe it!
 - I bet that my office has 10,000 needles ?!
 - Bet!
 - What?
 - What do you offer?
 - Everything!
 - What do you mean all?
 - Let's argue about it! Everything that I have everything that you possess!
 - Lets do it! I still do not believe, because it can not be! I'll bet you all !!! I have a house, "Marin", business! I put all!
 - I've got the old "Zhiguli" and the apartment! I bet that in my office is 10,000 sewing needles! Hand ?!
 - I bet! The judge, the prosecutor, smash!

Argued. The judge and the prosecutor in shock, but keep quiet. Who knows ?! Who are these kids from a special department knows ?! Maybe they have not told that the 37th year was long over ?!
We gathered and went to the garrison. The officer passed a solid company, much to cheer up, for the simultaneous visit of the judge, the prosecutor and special person - it is always an alarm event!

In order to create the appropriate ambiance in the office, Sergei switched on the desk lamp that of a dead yellow lampshade lit the pale faces of the judge and the prosecutor. Kommersant also noticeably nervous, because everything was at stake, but kept Gogol!

Sergei went to the cupboard and pulled out a bottle of cognac ... duty, chocolate and wine glasses. The guests smiled, saying the joke was successful and now owner of the office will begin ingratiating excuses that lured all of the bath, under the false pretext in order to savor brandy and admit bad joke.

While the prosecutor pouring cognac and chocolate broke Sergei with a distinctive jingle boomed on the table a cardboard box.
 - Read!

Slightly squinting in the dim lighting, the judge leaned over the box and began to read the yellowed and poorly printed label.
 - Sewing needles. 1,000 pieces. Article ...

Whack! Sergei casually put on the table the second box, and went after the third.
 - Will be considered individually or boxes?

Suppress brandy and realizing that he does not understand, the prosecutor said softly.
 - Seryozha, but still ... 10,000 needles Why?
 - Like what ?! With the planned economy in the Soviet Union were very strict sanitary standards. Each fighter has relied own personal needle under the nail, the infection is not to enter. Previously, the government cared about the personnel and staring at the prospect. Now that's some AIDS showed up, hepatitis C, and in the Soviet army each potential traitor relied and was scheduled own personal needle. Why the heck my division epidemic and massive loss of personnel from blood poisoning? It's in combat firing an article for the commander at any level, regardless of rank and regalia ...

Sergei caught courage and developing success shine eloquence - "Ostap suffered". Meanwhile, the businessman quietly slipped on the floor and fell into a deep swoon.

When the "new Russian" brought to life, he could not believe that a brand new "gelding", spacious home and a profitable business stay with him, because only by his modesty, NKVD Sergei generously forgives him all the reckless debt, based on the denial of obvious advantages planned economy.

© Copyright: Alex Sidorov 2012

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