Women's Story :))

There LJ yuzerzha citadell.
Quite an interesting girl who can give odds legendary :)) Zloebuchke, she almost did not write already.
That came across a story. It seems not funny, but funny

Hangover - a fine thing!
 Yesterday Lina diskohuyklub pulled me to shake my old bones.
At first I resisted desperately, but then decided to go for Lina die without me.
 With us went to another unfamiliar to me Madama named Lily.
The girls with a face like hers, I usually want to beat strongly.
 Although Lily is high and is not terrible, such minetnymi waffles, which peck the boys, but to fucking pretentious.
 As I learned later, in the mind of her computer, which considers every ruble spent and is always looking for a source of enrichment.
A sort of model of the mercantile girl.
 And three of Curva tumble in pop club in our village: Lina - a la schoolgirl on roaming, Lily - psevdomodel on renting of, and I - with ears pisda heron on Peron. Great Hall, which is half of the dance floor, and the second - tables drunks.
We take a table and long vyebyvayas, studying the menu.
I look around the audience and I see a couple of pieces of meat worthy of me.
Immediately I classify: Right Caucasians Islands left drunks tries, at the counter rookie, behind the old sorcerers, in the second hall - Pokemon.
 I began to drink poppin called swill gin & tonic, and soon people started to get around all the nicer. Me smile.
 Soon the dance floor fell out two chickens and started wagging assholes, and Caucasians, looking at them, began to choke saliva.
DJ was obviously stoned and hanged on a campaign case some pornosayte because ebla do not turn away from the monitor.
After these two dancers on the dance floor poured the whole woman's shantropa.
 Moreover, the focus has been very cow curvaceous, and believe me I am not pizhzhyu, the views of all the men lingered longest on her ass, while as skinny pins nervously smoking at the end of the queue.
By this time at our table we had sat down three guys Armenian appearance, one of whom was a former classmate of Lina and Lily.
 Next to me sat a guy whose name I never could pronounce, and remember, too.
 Feeling that I tear my head, I decided to blow away the cobwebs in the closet. A female toilet at the disco is steeper than the circus shopito.
Toilet paper was only one stall, so the whole mass of chicks struggling for the right wind off a piece more, hoping to poebstis that night with a clear pisdoy.
My women are somehow Sugar and afraid to look in my whorish eyes, so all the booths I lomlyus no threats have become wet face into the toilet.
Some mirrors circling the worst girls and botanka glasses, whose sense of humor, I do not understand, because it is at the level of petrosyanskogo.
 They are so much fun laughing and painted a sheen to the whole push, I thought I was at the feast of life. Bazar was about the:
 - I have a wedding tomorrow, you know it? hihi
 - Yes Yes! I congratulate hihi (smack smack)
 - Today I come off the last time hihi, tell lipstick
 - And we are now a leader Mahmoud bottle on the table, put hee hee
 - Cool. He had also put me (deep breath)
 And some asshole scattered the blush all the shells.
 And we have a table came about a humorous dialogue:
 I: you have 10 rubles?
 Lina: no
 I am well and went fucking fuck out of here! the legs were not!
 Now that's humor for the lower classes of society.
 Soon we will have lighted on the dance floor.
Our pink dancing with Lina attract male attention, many are already enthusiastically nadrachivat under tables.
But then came the dance floor is a schmuck. It was a dance stoned paralytic in the mix with its death throes.
 On the other side of us perched high hunchback. A minute later we had ducked out into the street because some shvabroid farted so that the start of cutting the eye.
 Stepping aside, we have become the top spit on someone's parked Mercedes, which was very dangerous occupation, during which we could fuck in the ass.
 Then in the hall, I met her neighbor, whom previously almost did not communicate.
During a slow dance, he told me the truth, you think of me, my neighbors.
I was even flattered that they think I am an isolated tsatsoy.
I am drunk I wanted to fuck her neighbor and even a football team in the bargain.
 Meanwhile, all the best pieces of meat have already discussed heifers slimmer.
 Our Armenian friends began to squeeze me and Lina on the street, and unclaimed Lily rushed around and yelling, it's time to go home. Soon the guys took Lily home, but I stayed with Lena night.
 At 5 in the morning two drunk in kakahu and netrahnutye deffki tumble to Lina's apartment and feel with all sorts of chuckles sneak into her room. What And this story does not end.
 Lying on a huge trahodrome, I accidentally grabbed leanin boob, and then somehow accidentally turned my hand in her pants.
And then it began some crazy lesbian orgy. We sucked Lina as fairies.
She jumped on me and kissed my chest, and my fingers were already in it. What a pity that I have no dick!
Then she pulled some long string, as it turned out, it is let down my panties. Lesbians cocks!
This bed scene, I was an asset, but a couple of times allowed her to dip their fingers in me. What a pity that it has no dick!
 And the rest of the time she tried to zalomat my hands and cling to my clitoris, which I did not want to let her because of the fact that women are not to fuck me, somehow it is not manly.
 I could not enjoy the taste of her breasts, to which sucked tightly. What a pity that I have no dick! But Lina had writhed and moaned on my ear.
 I imagine would ohueli her parents, they turn in at this point in the room.
 When it subsided, I took off her on the next pillow and immediately passed out. Subject ёbli disclosed two fingers!
 Waking up in the 12 days I replayed in my head all that was possible to remember and cursed poppin swipes. I had no dead wood, but I know I would die if I did a somersault through the head.
 Looking into my head, it would be possible to find dohera paradoxes, and no hint of logic in committing my actions.