Folk omens and aphorisms

If the smoke spread along the ground back and switch off the iron if the post rises can not go back.

If the left hand itches to money, if the nose drinking if both drinking for free.

Cats have a sign: if the road crossing the Negro

If the husband brings flowers for no reason then the cause is still there.

If a woman has a ring on his hand, then it is most likely married. If the beads, it does not mean anything. If the ring and beads, she is married, but that does not mean anything.

Screw scored with a hammer, holds stronger than nail hooked screwdriver.

You want to feel like a star on the tree sit!

I came thank you, thank you very much left

Life is given to man once, and mostly by accident

Upon the disappearance of her husband brought the two neighbors.

Better c Petrov in Mallorca than Major Petrovka.

Never be afraid to do what you can not do. Remember, the Ark was built by an amateur. Professionals built the "Titanic».

If you watch television, you must have noticed that the good guys always win bad, except the nine-hour news.

Citizens! Fly Aeroflot! Hurry! They left quite a bit.

If you think that nicotine does not affect a woman's voice, try to shake off the ash on the carpet.

When a woman says that she has nothing to wear it means that is over all things new. When a man says that he had nothing to wear it means that ended up clean.

The good thing is speed bumps and speed controls, and a nice move.

Russian road called the place where going to pass.

If you long to call relatives or friends, then they are fine.

Well not just where we do not have, and where we had never been there!

To help or hinder?

Often in the morning looking at a woman with horror you realize that what you seduced her yesterday, was not yours, but its merit.

When the family is only one wife, she grows selfish.

There are three reasons for absence: forgotten, washed down or score.

If you want to make God laugh tell him your plans.

Not so bad Russian tank as his drunken crew.

Like it or not but ass from behind.

And the wolves are fed and the sheep are safe, and the shepherd eternal memory.

If you have a beautiful wife, drop dead lover, cool car, no problems with the authorities and the tax authorities, and when you go out the sun always shines and you smile at passers-by say NO to drugs!

Mosquitoes are more humane than some women, so if a mosquito drinks your blood, it is, at least, cease humming.

There are three ways to do something: do yourself, hire someone, or forbid your children to do so.

Life is certainly not a success, but everything else was fine.

Make a woman happy is not difficult, it is hard to stay happy while.

If you argue with an idiot, probably the same thing and it does.

Correctly thrown her husband would return like a boomerang.

I infinitely respect the enormous choice of my people.

When pressed for time, there is no place for friendship, love alone.

Laziness is a simple Russian person is not a sin, but a totally necessary means of neutralizing the tireless activity leading them fools.

Laughing for no reason is a sign that you or an idiot, or a pretty girl.

Excuse me, what I say, when you interrupt.

Lottery is the most accurate method of accounting for the number of optimists.

This woman needs to cut down a tree, destroying a house and raise a daughter.

The patient went on the mend. But did not reach.

Send four caps on the toilet and you get a free roll of toilet paper!

Silly marry, and marry smart.

American universities are the place where Russian Jews teach mathematics Chinese.

Nightmare Freudian phallus Mobius.

Life goes so fast, as if she is not interesting to us

Brine drink tomorrow.

Laziness is the subconscious wisdom.

There are people in whom God lives. There are people in whom the devil lives. And there are people that live only worms. (F. Ranevskaya)

In every man's life there comes a time when clean socks easier to buy.

About wives: there is only a moment between past and future. It is called life.

Raised a man not a woman to make observations, bearing bad sleeper.

Milk is doubly funny if after cucumbers.

There are two infinity of the universe and stupidity. However, I'm not sure about the universe. (Albert Einstein)

The woman is not a sparrow flies can not feed.

Few know his worth should still be in demand.

Take care of home rest abroad.

Turn a girl's head so that her sick 9 months.

She arrived in Siberia, and it ruined him the hard labor.

Women, like children, like to say "no." Men are like children who take it seriously.

The highest degree of embarrassment two views encountered in the keyhole.

Everything is going well, just past

If you are calm, and around you in a panic, screaming people running around you may have * I do not understand

Nostalgia is when you want to return, but nowhere else.

In history it is difficult to enter, but it is easy to plunge.

If you have found the woman of his dreams with the rest of the dream you may have to say goodbye.

The rush is when the cocoa and shave simultaneously.

It's a shame when your dreams come true at the other!

In some major hemispheric protected by the skull, in other pants.

The Internet is the best way to satisfy your curiosity for the money your employer.

If you licked the ass, is not rasslablinysya grease!

The teaching of learning the rules, the experience of the study of exceptions.

It's nice when everyone noticed that you said something clever, but when no one noticed what you said stupid double pleasure.

Fools are not the mammoths, they do not die.

Girl, you are so nice to smell what you drink today?

If the mountain will not come to Mohammed, then, the grass was not very

A source