Crane driver Bashny.Net

Team "to complete repairs" found the crew of the submarine B-XX in the dock for a few days before the New Year. The commander of the submarine was announced: or 2 January, he reports on the readiness to move to the base of the plant, or 3 January, he no longer commander. The urgency of this is caused by - and who their headquarters there and plead, but exactly ssekut head off, since not ulozhishsya - promised.
Two months boat on piece of iron, glands and zhelezischam by cogs and Gadget took away all the shops of the plant for repairs, and now a few days all the iron not only had to collect and cram into the boat, but also to accomplish over the boat a docking operation - simply push out the boat from the dock. During the days that were - if not the navel unleash - volvulus will surely be. Or, as they say, shoot, Commander, pants and sang 'Separation'.
The second vote in the event of failure to sing 'Separation' was to the head of the dock -Home builders. For if the boat from the dock due time will come - Builders shines build garbage cans around the plant. Prior to retirement.
And the commander and command the builder wanted. Both have recently established themselves in positions of power have tasted. For it was ready. For all. Within reasonable limits.
Over a glass of tea laid out a plan, and began to implement it.
The commander had a headache iron. Do not squander, God forgive me, the plant used in any of the equipment handed in for repair. Builders - people. Where the eve finding fools willing to break into overtime, where the vodka is already heated, and the women covered with cold sweat?
But, like, everything was possible.
And when all the iron has been collected, it pulled off and fell to the dock near the dock when the specialists for hydraulic, air, electricity, shit and a couple and other kiebotehnike ants crawling all over the boat, and the officer, warrant officer and dumb sailors were ready to drop from lack of sleep and short of food, terrible happened - dock crane broke his arm. Break himself some other place - it somehow would have cost. A crane without a hand, you know, not a crane.
In short a complete 'bzdets'.
Singing 'Separation' for two voices threatened to become a reality. And, while the commander was preparing to sing, builder through the entire plant. Shake the other docks, he tossed the shops - and finally found. What and I told the commander. The commander sat down with joy to jump up to the ceiling.
-Don't Rush - besieged its builders - the parish. ON HIM. SEE. And listen at the same time. Maybe ... In short, come.
The commander went. Looked. He listened. That requires a crane.
Seen and heard shocked seasoned officer so that he immediately rushed to the boat, and announced the collection of all the officers and warrant officers. And he began to keep it in front of them.
 - Guys, all you know, asshole shine, and I could send his power, but, damn it, I do ... well, well I can not one way to substitute.
Builder course conscientiously I tried, found the crane - the master. Growth under two meters, shoulders - an oblique six feet. Boots size 50 and they, I think, are small, 'White Sea' smoking, and swearing on the fly -baklany fall authority. Work will, if we do it on a crane sewed liter rolled out, canned zakus, cans of eight different. And the guy. For the company.
 - So that it - subordinates tortured fuss - it We are always for business use ...
 - For the good of the cause! - Commander cried in despair - because after all, this crane-BABA !!!
Mordjukova Nonna compared with it - that Klavka Schiffer, roofing material on their heads! In this behind that 200-liter barrel, a person - it is better not to remember, nails like the claws of an eagle - describes the dreams commander.
-And Why she man? - Timidly asked Lieutenant - mehanёnok.
-I Asked her, she answered: What are you, commander, with only a tail fell, the hell the woman in the so to say, the age when a man drinking and under the zakus on overtime? Breaks will while away. The main thing that was horseradish. Without it, he told me the fuck do not need!
-A Man does not? - In unison cried frightened officers and midshipmen.
-No Man she did not go to work, refuses ...
Commander of its crew valued and respected, perhaps even loved. But not so. In such heroism is not signed. In the fire there in the water, went to B, but on a mountain to climb - well, no one. Do not raised. Stagnation. Volunteers there.
Okay, guys - with bitterness in his voice began commander.
-And If Sergushov? - Interrupted the Kom Commander warhead 4, 7 - he's everything that moves, rushing, and when drunk, stir that was not moving, and also, that ...
Where Sergushov? -zaoral in facilitating commander.
A Sergushov - eternal misery B-XX and in combination -vychislitel engineer - slept the sleep of the righteous drunk. Taking advantage of the lull, procured somewhere half-banks took and fell to sleep in the cabin. And because the meeting was not present and we have not heard Commander.
Therefore, for the full ignore the collective interests of his fate was assigned reshena- suffer.
At the appointed time, when the crane operator went to saddle dock crane Kom CU-4, 7, woke Sergushov.
-Koroche, Sergei, there's your job - liter sewed, canned food here, roach and blow on tap, there is a crane, the company currently requires - without the company refuses to work, naughty. You better try, his whims of umni.
-Easy - Motonul drunken head against Sergushov.
-And More careful with him, he said, the crane operator, yet a woman ...
-BABA !!! - I yelled Sergei, grabbed and pulled gifts on tap.
All dock froze in silence. Waited. Dispute. Immediately Sergushov overthrow, or five minutes later when he makes out.
But the crane began to move, a hook went down, and the headphones Builder bass rumbled kranovshitsy:
-Tseplyay !!!
And she went to work.
The first break kranovshitsa asked for half an hour and it lasted for minutes 15.
In the dock again, wondered how it will end.
But after 15 minutes the bass kranovshitsy announced:
 - Cling!
And earn more.
After the fourth, had a half-hour break, factory laborers, crane operator familiar with the habits, become baptized in horror:
 - It is you that iron planed?
-And Then! - Proud colleagues, Christ-- moget!
Both are well aware where to lengthen breaks.
A crane working. And kranovschitsa, knocked the breath wheezed:
 - Cling!
And vague shadows were moving to the beat in the cab of the crane ...- Vir Main, Vira, Lane ...
By 12 day weather got much better. All the iron, which was necessary, and shoved the boat in its place. He stopped the crane.
They met as the astronauts met with mild surprise mixed with superstitious fear.
Kranovshitsa entered the dock, carrying tired and drunk to smoke Sergushov slung over the neck, in the manner of a fox collar. She went to the astonished commander, and carefully, like a child sleeping Sergushov handed in his arms surrounded the officers and warrant officers.
 - Take care guys, Commander, gold, -hlopnula Commander friendly shoulder, howled, whimpered like a woman and went away, leaving traces in the snow with tears the size of saucers and boots from size 50, which are small.

© Gorilych

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