Serving excellent Odessa humor

Many people have a good sense of humor, but the most original jokes can be heard only from resourceful citizens of Odessa.

< Website

• - Monechka, my dear, tell me, do you remember when you decided to marry me
  ? - Of course I remember! When I learned that you have given me a bouquet sold, I immediately realized: you're just the kind of woman that I need - Solomon Markovich, sho a mature age
  !? - This is the period between the end of the illusions of youth and start of old age hallucinations -. Abram, why do not you buy a car
  ? - What for? When I feel good, I carries the police, and when the bad - ambulance Rose Markovna stood in front of the supermarket and quietly whispered. "Lord, help me to buy only what came ...»
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  • - Benny, I still guarantee you sho in five years we will have a better life than in Europe
    ! - A sho they happen - So, Sarah, your diet: one apple, one egg and cheese
    . - Clearly, the doctor, it is before or after meals -? Sarah, you and I married the first day, and only quarrel ...
    - Tackie two years I waited for this day «God Better safe than sorry!" - Moshe thought, when he runs out of ink in the pen at the time of registration in the registry office -. Sarochka sho ve hold me for a fool ?!
    - Yes, I'm your fool and do not touch -! Mom, not shoby I'm not glad to see you, just did not have time for you to get bored ...
    
    
    
    
    
    
    • - My Lucy forever whining: "mine have nothing to wear, nothing to wear mine!»
      - Oh, Fima, I beg you! Give her a sack of potatoes, and let yourself is -! Samuel Markovic, you're strong, you can do it
      ! - Jacob, I'm smart, I did not even undertake Odessa market:
      ! - Madam, how much is your chicken
      ? -. 40 hryvnia
      - And so, I did not think Schaub for you bad -? Celia, you have a shred of conscience is
      ? - You sho, still instill
    • -? Tell me, and I sho still going to have for his unselfishness - Hello, Semen Abramovich! How's life?
      - In life, of course, is not enough, but, thank God, the funeral we also can not afford ...
      
      
      
      
      
      
      • - Firochka and de have you been? Shaw a long time since you have not seen!
        - Yes to work in Italy I went
        . - Are you at least do not occur: always spoil the mood - Oh, Rabinovich, come again! then so well without you!
        
        
        
        
        via # image9581665