Why do not love America

Surely many people interested in the question - where in us so much hatred toward the United States? Each of us is definitely sticking to his opinion about it, but agree among your friends more than those who does not like her at least. The author of this article tries to shed some light on some things that he can not tolerate it.

And you have something to add? In America, all sorts of nasty things, such as a system of measures, painful love for healthy eating and tests for driving theory invented a maniac autistic. America - a fat man with a pasted smile that runs from morning to a heart attack, comforted kilogram of antidepressants every day, and two units of bourbon on Fridays.





Covering letter. Letter about how ardently I want to work for you. Said US employers appreciate the passion for good cover letter. Sit down, probably, all the personnel department, pull out and read handkerchiefs, wiping away tears at a special moment. I have not been able to verify if this is true. I always felt like screaming in infinite vacuum.

I could make a novel out of my cover letters. It will be a schizophrenic book about a man who is slowly losing hope to reach the hearts of his beloved and against this background that went crazy. At first I wrote formally, as I was taught in the courses for the unemployed: "Dear Company X! As a seasoned professional, so I will be a great addition to your team of professionals that you ofigeete. Please accept ... "Then it seemed to me that a little personal details will not interfere, and I began to closely study the sites of employers. I personally wrote to the heads of HR-departments: "Dear Lindsay! I write to you, feeling like Christopher Columbus first set foot on the unknown coast of the American continent. I am a seasoned professional with experience in the largest companies of Belarus, become so perfect addition to your team, you ofigeete ... ". In the latest series of madness was this: "Dear Company Y! I write to you, what else? I would like to know, reading anyone in California cover letters? »

No, no one reads. The operation will only accept an acquaintance or if you specifically hunt for (immigrants, it is not you). Personally, I found a job, going to the store and filling in the form of the hand, generally nothing on hoping. A cover letter - is a kind of cynical mockery: first hour you fill the online form, where all find out, to the point, what was your morning chair. And then you want to express how much you love this fucking company, which found out an hour ago, and as a cherished dream to give her the best years of your life.



Nobody wants to talk to me like I'm crazy or pediculosis. Everywhere I did not call, the answering machine is activated and offers me to leave a message. Medical office, the social service, the electric company. Major villains, like telephone service providers, plunge into the abyss of human multiple choice, where the first three options, leading to five options, followed by another three. There is no one to offer a chocolate bar or a jar of instant coffee, to speed up the process. I know that all they want is that I lost patience and gave up, but rather died. At the end of the road I usually waits for the most disgusting in the world music and lyrics: "Your call is very important to us. All subscribers are now busy with other customers, waiting time is 5 minutes. " Llguny whom you treat? The waiting time is at least 55 minutes.



American's last words: I have everything perfectly. Things can not be bad, and I do not need help, just let the water wash down tabletochku.
I do not know who taught them this. This is probably the echo of Protestant stoicism or some of cholera, but complain about the difficulties are made only on a cot at the psychoanalyst. Our favorite way of therapy, vodka Druganov in America is not accepted. They drink openly in bars, taking responsibility for themselves, and not in the kitchen, as we do. The bartender, despite the film propaganda, not a good therapist. As a result, Americans are so great that I have a cognitive dissonance: I see that the man has gone scab from adversity, but he swears to me in reverse with a passion that my head spin. The complainant hand, while they themselves are taking antidepressants.



The landlord will not give you a flat - look for a guarantor, who vpryazhetsya for you. Car loans will not receive. Or received, but under gangster percent. Because no credit history - who are you? A drug addict, a thief or a Martian. Americans historically do not like Martians, and rightly so, as he wrote HG Wells. Fragile flower credit history grows slowly and dies of each draft. It took me two years to ensure that its to grow: two years I regularly earn and spend, earn and spend, and never missed a single payment. It turns out to spend almost more important than making money. The first thing George said Double Yu after the September 11 attacks, was: "Go to the store and buy in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, Amen." Two years shy cockroach life and reward daily envelopes with proposals include my money to another bank. You should have seen the spam - coated paper, embossed, water marks and enclosed plastic dummy credit cards. Meanwhile, all around we are concerned about the conservation of natural resources. There is no end to this holiday of hypocrisy.



In 1934, the US government introduced direct subsidies in the amount of 0, 5 cents per pound of sugar produced in the United States, and became very profitable to produce. But the trouble - Americans consume enough, so all concerned to the negotiating table and agreed to put sugar wherever possible. American products are approximately 6 grams per slice of bread, 28 grams per jar of yogurt, 42 grams tin soda. There is nothing to comment.



In regard to the indication of expiry, US producers are modest, as monks. Especially this sin big corporations, poisoners of mankind. It is understandable why - no one likes to know that it is edible yogurt for another two years. The consumer now has gone sophisticated and immediately became interested in than trying to feed it. So instead of a clear indexation I constantly ran into fuzzy wording "Better to use before that date", as if I would say it will lie down, and even after that date, trample, do not worry. Also, do not look for the expiration date none of the obvious places, it will be hidden in the most unexpected corner and carelessly printed as voluntary surrender.



The so-called next holiday in America - it's such a special joke humor. In a society where the passion for work is higher than the love of parents, vacations shy. I'm talking about the private business and government live where Privolnaya. So, slowly accumulated vacation, like honey flowing into the cup. The rate of accumulation increases with the time: the more you have worked at your company, the more likely your days are collecting. After four and a half years, laid on the altar of my office, I was earning an average of 12 vacation days per year. How do you - twelve days? Not too tight? Of course, you can negotiate and prisobachit to another couple, unpaid, but the main thing not to pinch. And you can easily come back, showing off a Caribbean tan, and see in their workplace unfamiliar snout through which the cross is written: "Do not had a vacation since the second grade." By the way, you know, what is the duration of paid maternity leave in California? Six weeks.



Planning is everything. For example, the life of ten years ahead, and do not hesitate to ask about it. Quite a legitimate question in the interview the US - who do you see yourself in five years? What do you want to achieve and how? What can respond to this man from Minsk, except - yes you ofigeli ?! I do not know where I'll be tomorrow! But they know they will get a law degree after five years, seven years zavedut child and thirty pay the mortgage. Some even know where to lay the urn with their ashes.
As all here are savvy, have to think quickly and to make decisions quickly, and I do not like how the passion. For example, tickets: the chances that someone will change his mind and return the ticket, there is no - there is too much money. Flights will never be cheaper, just run out and an appointment with a doctor can be reached no sooner than three weeks, and I have oh how it hurts! And no these eternal tetechek that povorchat and even give a warm coat instead of a numbered, tell what or where will bring the dark hallway to the right office.



I otzhmuril one eye and looked at the table of fines online DMV. It said more than 15 miles per hour - 389 dollars. Suddenly I felt an extraordinary lightness. I thought - because now I do not have to sit in the evenings, choosing a skiing season - ski turned my income the state budget! For easy and simple traffic violation in California in one fell swoop it freed me a lot of free time.

Two continuous worth $ 300, traveling without a stop - 400, illegal parking from 40 to 100. But go find me angry citizens with stickers "Park as an eccentric" - do not have them. Citizens paid a couple of times, and is now well aware of where to park and how to ride.





Source: mtrpl.ru

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