Three Lola about dogs

1
Letter to his dog:

Dear Fido,
 Plates with your bite - your plate.
The rest of my. Nadkusyvaya all the plates, you will not achieve to become all yours.
So stop.

Ladders are not designed for Formula 1, so stop them running around when I hold your leash.
I'm tired because I have always sore ass.

I can not buy the bed more than we currently have.
And do not think that I will be in the future to sleep on the couch, just because of the fact that you prefer a bed.

My CDs - it's not a mini flying saucers.

Correct procedure - first lick me and then sniff the other dog's ass.
 And not vice versa.

Sincerely, owner

2
ANNOUNCEMENT:
 "Lost dog on three legs.
Special features: when he wrote - it falls. »

3
 Announcement on the pole:
 Found dog. The collar
 Breed - Poodle
 Color - Grey
 Responds to the name of Mickey
 Very playful
 It tastes like chicken
 Owners thanks