Man, do not you show.

Christmas story told by my colleague in the smoking room. I had a friend and colleague - a simple Russian Negro (let's call him John). Russian, he was as much as possible - was born here, in the army, and even had a 2-year suspended sentence for his work as a foreman at a construction site :).
 Once we decided to celebrate New Year in the forest. December 30 came to choose a place filled ice slides, tents, and so on. N.
 The night of 30 to 31 of December. Frost about -24 degrees. All are asleep, gathering strength before the New Year's night.
 Somewhere around midnight, John awoke from a natural urge of nature. The urge was small but important. Swearing, John got out of the sleeping bag and (deciding that efforts on the process of dressing-undressing himself in this case does not justify) popped up in some batches of the tent.
 He found a comfortable place in the snow (it turned out to be Rolled trails), I pulled out of the heats that was needed and started the process.
 I hope you will understand why we were all woken up by wild shouts of the skier, which saw the frosty night naked! Negro!
 defecate in the snowy woods!
... And the black man ran after him and shouted in fluent Russian:
 - Man! Everything is fine! You do not have imagined!