“The patient must be pale, the victim of violence is depressed, the mother like a lemon.” Bashny.Net

In September, a young actress and model Stella Baranovskaya died of leukemia. And all would be fine, but when the girl learned about the terrible diagnosis, and her friends began to raise funds for treatment, the public immediately rushed. swindle. After all, a cancer patient can not look well-groomed, publish photos in social networks and lead an active lifestyle. Where do you see that? Sick? Suffer!





"Site" It offers to understand why in our society a sick person is supposed to be pale, dull and endlessly unhappy.

The sickest person “Something you don’t look sick” is a familiar expression of doubt, as if during a cold or after a serious illness you need to behave, following some particular algorithm. If you don’t suffer enough, then not so sick. Why does an active lifestyle during illness cause a lot of criticism and disapproval?





And how many of us had to hide from a teacher or classmates, having met them during a cold? What if they think that the disease is not at all, and parents bought a certificate to school? Although it is obvious that during a cold you can and should spend time in the fresh air, and not sour in the four walls. And school, on the contrary, is not worth going so that classmates are not put at risk.





Stereotypes say that you need to get sick lying down, wrapped in a hundred blankets, instead of organizing a comfortable and productive recovery. From early childhood, we are used to the fact that the most common cold is a big holiday, because if it is good. "play sick"You can spend a week at home doing nothing. The main thing is to skillfully play your role.





This public reaction is somewhat reminiscent of the stories of people who were subjected to violence, but surprisingly too steadfast and calm. It’s like a person who has survived a difficult situation and has not committed suicide makes a fuss out of nothing.





Few people think that sickness A person in public hardly speaks about the state of his inner world. After all, often efforts turned outward help to stop concentrating on the problem and even have a therapeutic effect.





What a sick person looks like - not an indicator. For example, after a severe diagnosis, people continue to be active and enjoy life. Thus, a new set of priorities takes place. When it becomes obvious that life can end at any moment, you want to enjoy every day.





If you have not had to go through suffering, then no illness or achievement is considered worthy of support. Do you manage to get a manicure and go to the gym, raising a one-year-old child? What kind of mother are you? Did you get three degrees and have a successful career? Your achievements are worthless unless you have climbed to the stars from utter poverty.

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And now you are faced with a serious illness and disorder. Please get the opposite reaction: “Why can’t you, such a rag, get together?” Hold on! Watch out! Don't hang up! It turns out that the level of suffering that would suit everyone simply does not exist. The sick man turns out to be double-lightHe does not hang his nose, he is not sick, and if he shows how bad he is, he is definitely a whiner.





In one case or another, there is a depreciation of someone else’s experience. Instead of showing compassion and understanding, society tends to fence itself off. But no one knows for sure what is really going on in the life of another person, what he feels and what efforts he has to make to overcome the current situation.





A person who continues to smile in spite of a serious illness deserves the same respect as a person who suffers from the pain of hell. Apparently, each of us should be a little kinder and more caring, do not look for a trick in every little thing and stop suspecting everyone and everything. Do not judge, and you will not be judged.

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