Of excessive expectations: we deserve exactly what we get Bashny.Net

Did you ever wonder: why there are so many unhappy people? A happy person is very difficult to meet, so it seems that life is full of bitterness and turmoil, it's normal.

In fact, it should not be a normal state of mind — joy and peace. Unfortunate we do high expectations to his family, his income, his career and still a lot.

A person with excessive expectations it seems that in his unstable inner state to blame the environment and their own imperfection. He sure is nervous due to the mismatch between the reality of his desires, and to calm down, needs to make dreams come true. But high expectations are different from the common desire for improvements to the fact that they are unfounded — not backed by real features of an object that is directed.





In fact, it is a psychological disorder that is accompanied by anxiety, nervousness, suspiciousness. Those who have acquired the syndrome of exaggerated desires always think they deserve more than we have. Often such people do not realize that do not meet the level of their own queries.

So, they can apply for posts that do not have a residual competence; dream to marry an idol or marry a celebrity. The ceiling of their ambitions does not exist.

The conflict between the real and the fictional world, the inability to achieve a goal again breeds anxiety and anxiety — the circle closes.

This syndrome stems from an inferiority complex — through external attributes (beautiful wife, riches, a fancy house) man tries to compensate for internal nesamodostatochnosti.

Receiving from the life "from gate turn", he is even more immersed in your complex. From the exorbitant demands are affected and surrounding, and the man himself.

Very often it manifests itself in the relation of wives to husbands — the woman always seems to be that her husband is not good enough, not earn, not able to properly perform her job. However, she forgets that, too, is not perfect. Beloved wife gnaws herself constantly upset by his incompetence.

The same we do with children, demanding that they were meticulous and geeks — but they are just children discovering the world through mistakes.





Excessive demands occur and to yourself be the best, to do everything at the highest level — hence the perfectionism.

But here's the catch — often we deserve exactly what we get. And our mental balance depends on perception. Either we are too demanding on his life — and therefore unhappy because she does not conform to our inflated expectations, or take it for what it is. You just need to remember that the husband (wife) and children — real people, they too have their weaknesses, and not all are born to be presidents of the millions of companies...

The first step on the path of struggle with the syndrome of high expectations — his awareness, the understanding that this is a trap of self-deception, which cannot be caught. If all the time to think about what things could be better, it is possible to suffer from it forever, because the limit does not exist.

The most profitable investments generally, investments in yourself. Only constant self development makes a person interesting, both for others and for himself.published

 

Author: Michael E. Litvak

 

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

Source: litvak.me/statyi