How to stop judging

Whether it's a fatal attraction to perfection, chronically in a bad mood or love to attack other reasonable (and unreasonable) forms of life, many people share a common problem — a painful desire, to condemn. For some it is pleasure, others understand the depravity of what is happening (but can't always resist), most of the “patients” and is doing everything unknowingly, never asking too many questions. What is this psychotropic attack?

The essence of the phenomenon Estimates and judgments about the world is an integral part of human consciousness. Without critical evaluation of reality is impossible to survive. But the consciousness does not regret to stay only on the essential things — it continues to work constantly to evaluate all around and condemns. This is happening all around us constantly. The announcers on TV talk indignantly about the machinations of the capitalist countries. Evil gossip thick streams dripping through the corridors of organizations. And even the sweetest, well-mannered person, no, no, scold someone with an unexpected passion. To judge is natural and even fun, it is an inevitable part of life, both personal and public. All is well and safe until then, as long as you keep a sense of proportion, but it is worth it to let you down – start problem. The first to speak a kind of aura of alienation. The surrounding is cool to people with an excess of negativity and criticism in behavior, even if the gloomy manifestations do not affect them directly. A bad mood is transmitted from source will want to move away. Your negative comments will inevitably lead to frequent quarrels and constantly damage all existing relations. Craving for condemnation, if you meet people with similar inclinations will lead to the formation of “circle of gossip”. They do not like anybody. The second is much more serious, for it will settle in your head. Excessive craving to condemnation at the same time and nourish the dark corners of your consciousness, and itself is supported by them. Fear, envy, hatred, forcing their hosts to condemn. Formed a vicious circle, always hungry to new bursts of negative and destructive life of their “host”. In addition, you are risking their health – you can feel bad and broken. Found something familiar? Take countermeasures.


Redecorating behavior Brains of the majority of people are not soaked so the black darkness of evil. Just their tongues willfully Express a lot of things. Are you one of them? Luck is on your side, the case is not heavy. You need to train only one – hold treacherous language in conclusion, for teeth. To start practice in most light situations, annoying you is minimal. Try not to say anything negative and to avoid other signs of indignation (sighs, looks, characteristic facial expressions, unfriendly manipulation of objects). Mentally calm yourself, forgive others minor infractions (give them a chance!), don't get angry at things that are beyond your control. When trifles cease to annoy you, learn to maintain a balance in more serious cases. Gradually, without breaking your “vow of silence” you will start to wean (just!) addiction. To endure is absolutely impossible? It happens. In such cases, try to speak finely, gracefully, replace ramming a bunch of negative irony, sarcasm, or if it fits into your image, with black humor. It is possible that while you think the thought, not finding a decent way out, will die. Don't forget to monitor not only the speech, but also text. It is unlikely you will achieve results if in life awake my dear to remain silent, and to your favorite social network to terrorize friends horrible messages and comments. Such self-medication will not make you Holy, but self-control is the ability extremely valuable, useful for life. I myself Discovered my running problem? Do not despair. Willpower will allow you to change for the better. But don't expect anything simple. You will need not only to carefully follow the instructions in the “repair behavior”, but to go further. Well think about it. Look in the depths of his consciousness the source of irritating you pain. Dig is in the most dark corners of your past. Ruthlessly go through your unfulfilled dreams, unhealed resentments and all the things that seriously shocked you. Most likely, the reason for your bad critical attitude hidden in there somewhere. Take the sadness of the past years, penetrating gaze. Wanted to be a basketball player, but only increased to one and a half meters? Not a problem! But it's easier to choose clothes and to fit in narrow spaces. Too little money? Everyone has a chance. Find people bags with currency in landfills! All the princes some mediocre and entirely without horses. Probably, the most chic somewhere delayed, but will arrive soon. In other words, let lurking in the gloom the fierce battle. Then look at your life successes (large, small or even future), and otherwise set yourself up for increase in self-esteem. Do something, that'll get the praise of his own subconscious and, most importantly, others. And the more good and right you'll feel, the less you will want to condemn. Will disappear by itself the need. Black cloud, giving you the sweet life, lurking in the future? Are you tormented by the specter of old age? Emery thought that career is over before it begins? The coming end of the study and failure of the uncertainty on? Other bitter truths, embarked on the horizon? Come up with something. Comforting. Or act boldly, to dig through trash heaps of fate on the way to a better tomorrow. Condemnation of the living and non-living within a radius of 100 kilometers, you definitely will not help.Ironically some people the problem is not low, and too bloated self-esteem. If you are one of these heroes who try to tame their pride, consoling her with sweet thoughts. Just because you do not have to remove the Royal crown! You just might become a good king (Queen) and do not scold the foolish serfs, and to treat them with condescending grace, warm them in the radioactive light of your greatness. Finally, glance over your social circle. It is not excluded that others adversely affect you, pulling you into gossip, thereby encouraging the darker side of your consciousness. Try to spend time with them less time, and if not – revise format of behavior with such people. Naturally, an effort is necessary to stop and to cause gossip, even harmless. Work can take a long time. The nut in front of you solid. A trip to the psychologist You are absolutely convinced that you will not be able to heal yourself? Go to a psychologist. These ubiquitous plumbing of mental spaces, of course, are perfectly familiar with this problem as “compulsive pathological craving for condemnation.” They will gladly try to help you, it is only necessary to make an appointment. What are you waiting for? You in varying degrees, in an accessible and convincing (which depends on the chosen specialist) will explain how your negative view of reality is poisoning your own existence and leads to a dead end. And it's a perfect truth, which, however, is difficult to understand and apply on their own. By determining the degree (sad tone) of your problem, the psychologist will offer you a path, “course of treatment”. And here you must understand the main thing – you will be offered an opportunity, not a pill. But it will still be your in-house work force. No magic in the offices of psychologists does not occur. Harm from talking with a psychologist will not (except financial costs) and benefits – is possible. In addition, such an adventure is always curious know.


Religion and the mysterious practice of Religion was the main spiritual food and medicine for mankind for millennia, and its Ministers were easily replaced psychologists. Christianity, Islam, Judaism, definitely warn the faithful from the condemnation of their neighbors. The right to a just God and a mortal, illegally appropriating it brings a lot of troubles, preventing the establishment of a righteous relationship with others and God. You can delve into the reading of spiritual literature or contact the priest for the necessary answers and explanations. Unfortunately, most modern people are not so strong in faith. But if you are a happy exception – it will help you for sure. World religion does not give you the answer? The globe is full of other ways to achieve spiritual heights. Mystical and mysterious. For example, can practice yoga – it is, according to adherents, brings to perfection not only the body but the mind. After reaching enlightenment, you are guaranteed to get rid of the small, mundane things like need someone to discuss. The main thing in spiritual quest not to get on the slippery path, where you will be trapped Siberian witches, psychics, and even worse, the cultists. Summary Living in the modern, evil world, it's hard not to snap at the reality, do not give blind date reality, beset with endless problems. But if you feel that such bouts of negativity in your life happen more often, and you control them weaker, turning into a vicious need internal beat anxiety, fight. At stake is the good weather in your soul and how you will be seen by others.

 

Source: womanonly.ru/psihologija_i_karera/psihologija/ja_hochu_perestat_osuzhdat

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