Golden kids — the problem of modernity

Who has not heard about the "Golden boys" and "the Golden girls", who do not believe that the laws are written for them?

They have moms and dads. This is a "difficult" mother, and "uneasy" dad, are papamama the wizards who any life a pumpkin turn into a carriage. If calusco fell and broke his nose on the ground, the parents would give the planet a strong kick in order not to hurt the child.
 


Of course, all come to mind in the first place detushki chiefs who commit crimes, literally, on a regular basis. Papamama pull the baby from any position, how would he in this situation would fail. But it's not just about "rich" history. Golden kids problem. Just have more modest capabilities papaman not enough power to pull their child out of problems to which he climbed. That is, these Golden children to fall out of the world much earlier and they never have the opportunity to grow to the size of the true villains.

There is a style of parenting –"populatenode". The basis of it—the complete lack of restrictions for a child. His motto is "Freedom above responsibility." The most important thing that? The child has not grown sandwiched, did not become a "slave". And the fact that he's not responsible for his actions... so... grow up will understand! While the "onerbank".

Usually children with this parenting style are not allowed to solve their problems. Took a shovel from a friend in the sandbox? Friend roars into three streams? The mother arrives and explains to the parent of the victim, that vaadata, she needs her child to learn to share. And then, look, your, crying like a little girl, and undermines their hysteria fragile mental state my son. And therefore inflicts terrible damages. So... give us the shoulder... and then have to treatment undermined the nerves of my baby to cheilitis.

Yes, it comes to the absurd, but the parents of such a child can very easily to any situation to turn so nacrolepsy the baby will always be not guilty. The child has no opportunity to learn how to interact with others, because he sees no boundaries, when it goes too far, and it's just not right. No experience of resistance and answer, when in the sandbox you might get "unfair" and the owner will take his spade. And don't even care that there is fine mental organization happened. The blade of it.

"No," tetushki for myself there. There are people who for some reason make it impossible to obtain what you want. There, they, the owners of the blades, there is "no". You can't force dedushku feel not comfortable. So the child can give in the eyes of comrade just because he caused a slight displeasure. And then it will be just genuinely surprised that his judge. Get it right! My mood was darkened because of the nasty boy. He is guilty, it is impossible to upset me.

In collaboration with the parents and the child often learns that the more and louder he is upset, the sooner forgive him and solve his problem. The more parents put pressure on opponents. Therefore, it is desirable upon failure of the scapula to fall into hysterics, and then sand the instrument of labor will be fast in the hands.

Yes, virtually all children pass through the age of such violent emotional outbursts on octas. But then, when they're already easier to begin to regulate their emotions, all these vzbryki stop. For a child who grows up in a permissive family, the period of emotional turbulence persists for life. Not given on the road to change lanes? What byaki! Wow, like a kid angry! Got out of the car and smashed the windshield of the offender. H? Suffers himself to blame. There is nothing to cause negative emotions among the good boys.

Such children are much worse than learn the curriculum. Assessment –not an indicator. Papamama will come and poreshat questions with good academic performance. He does not need to work or study. It just happens and it does not matter if you know what is 2+2 or not. Baby grows and moves in his career up to the time when papamama can't resolve all issues and close all sums of money knowledge gaps.

But the kids, even when detected at the level of its extreme incompetence, do not understand that they are nothing and can do nothing. They spin some unpromising businesses that are building projects with self-oxy... STI, often drawing on the connection of parents and their money. However, they are quite sure that "built a career with his own hands" and "started from scratch". Here's one not a bit helped.

Parents they usually don't respect. Papamama, they are "automatic Savior". The child goes through life without looking, knocking on the road with tubs of flowers and dropping candy wrappers. Papamama running back with a broom and shovel and clean the dirt. Their business that serene being continued, so that when the child turned around, he saw nothing that could cause him anxiety. It was, as always, for this to do anything it was not necessary. It is very well from infancy been opened.

Since there is no one in this life who would be worth to care, have absolutely nothing to ponder, what is good and what is bad. Especially if detochka want something right here and now. Everything is possible, if so desired. You can go on cheating, the crime, you can substitute others. Including and parents.

Despite the fact that baby a king-king and the Shah in one person, he has a pretty low self esteem and high levels of anxiety. Still, the underlying understanding of the inability to independently control their life is. There are quite a lot of experience of social rejection. Even the whole pressure parents cannot make, for example, a workforce grew to love the goat. Not all girls are delighted with the treatment of them as powerless objects of pleasure.

Low self esteem has kept up with different ways that is called overcompensation. They need to show their superiority. The people are very much physical violence at the slightest provocation, because very quickly begin to feel frustration. They need to be seen to participate in events that allowed not only the elite, regularly to demonstrate the possession of special things that the bulk of the population cannot afford. They are very often the authors of texts on the subject of his exclusivity with the evil comments about others. If they do not have them increases anxiety. They begin to feel that they are drowning.

These people often struggle with the authorities. But not because there with the authorities that something was wrong by and large. But because the children want ice cream, right here and now, and the store is closed. If the ice cream will be each time you "want", and authorities will, as mom and dad, running after them and picking up trash below the brow of the little child is not darkened, and the claims to authority will not.

They are afraid of public censure? But do not care! They were always blamed. Well, of course, just trash and envy could not blame. These wretched fellows just makes no sense to waste your time. They are simply a means of obtaining a "want", the rest of the time, the existence of cattle is meaningless. Figley think about it.

The child grows into a defective personality that can only exist in conditions of constant creating and maintaining the illusion of his power. Without this, it is not there. And so, when such detushek very much, they very well support the illusion of each other. They do not understand, not appreciate, not be grateful or empathetic. In their world it is not. published Author: Natalia Stilson

P. S. And remember, just changing your mind — together we change the world! ©

 

Source: gutta-honey.livejournal.com/