Fresh humor! Bashny.Net

- Honey, I want a baby.
 - Why?
 - From ...
 - From ?!

One man, always turn off the lights when fucked his wife. And once my wife wanted new experiences and it is in this case turned on the light. To her surprise, she discovered that her husband is using a dildo in hand.
 - Oh, you bastard, so all these years, you had me with that thing !? Filthy pervert !!! Come explain !!!
 - I'll explain now. And then you explain how our children.

The husband comes home from the supermarket. The wife takes the products and puts on the shelves of the refrigerator. Wife puzzled:
 - Listen, you're a beer bottle is not fully sold!
 - Uh uh ... I bought something there ... (looks at the check) and yes! One full, one is not complete and four more empty.

 - As a girl to attract the attention of men?
 - Nice enough to undress.
 - Is not beautiful?
 - Better not to get undressed. Although ... Undress!

Voldemort gives interviews. Journalist:
 - Lord Voldemort, you have many enemies?
 - Yes, many - as many as two cemeteries.

 - I've been on the beach yesterday saw two swimmers girls! Completely naked !!!
 - In this cold ?! Probably, walruses!
 - Well, one sure walrus, and the other is nothing - simpatichnenkaya.

In the automotive market:
 - You I slips! Are you laughing at me? Acceleration from zero to one hundred twenty minutes! Well at least run small. But overclocking! And you think I'll buy this moldy stuff?
 - What do you want! It's an asphalt roller, not the car!
Further more ...

Primitive men have learned to speak after the woman decided to take by force and promises.

In store:
 - Do you have laundry gum?
 - No!
 - A pant with elastic?
 - There!
 - Then I nadergano 3 meters!

Husbands and lovers! Do your duty, do not rely on each other.

The Romanian authorities have banned drivers to get behind the wheel while intoxicated.
Now drunk Romanian drivers have to drive a car while standing.

Tricks of the Trade.
The best way to train memory for peeped payroll colleagues.

Fucking search engine! I want to find a normal wallpaper, Average, which hung on the wall !!!

On the concert of Bob Dylan fans piled Dima Bilan - just do not know how to read yet.

All my life I was the head of the family. So he told his wife before the wedding.

 - Damn, where uёbische?
 - You mean who?
 - Ah, there you are.

Guss Hiddink came to the pharmacy:
 - Me, please validol 11 tablets.
 - Uh ... maybe 11 Gandon?
Sad looking away - 11 Gandon already have.

Selling party.
Mironov.