As fear of love? Bashny.Net

Fear of love occurs in people who are very interested in love. They associate with love the enjoyment of his life and environment for a wonderful, beautiful, sturdy existence. They tend to love, but suppress it in the subconscious. Because of this suppression of fear and love.

This happens very early, even in childhood, when the child begins the process of puberty. During this period, he reads relevant books, watching relevant films and becomes agitated love. He has hope that when he grows up, you'll see a big, beautiful and happy love. So, you enter the ideal of love.



When there is the ideal of love, all hopes of this child are associated with love. We introduce a vertex that never will be met. The rate is so high, that the love becomes a distant obsession, and ideal — Procrustean bed. The child does not realize it, this happens on a subconscious level.

Ideal exceeds all human norms, he's made from a certain images, certain books, certain poetry, certain movies. The child begins to pick up, how will this man or this woman, what appearance, what size, how to dress, how to smell and so on.

It is inherent in anxious and insecure children. To 7 years they are already formed. Sex starts to worry them somewhere to years 12 – 14 years, and in between, with 9 to 14, they create a collective image of their future beloved. Preparing himself to the unearthly pleasures with another man or woman, they distance themselves from themselves, and all hopes of the other person begin to grow and flourish.

This collective image remains at the subconscious level in the form of the ideal. From that moment the child is closed, protected and nedostigenii it creates the ideal, obrechena it becomes to dislike. The ideal becomes the protection of life. The child loses its innocence, the innocence, the purity, and closes in such a way so as never to risk, never to enter into my life another person, not perfect.

Now this kid is closed from the others. The girl, for example, says: "this boy don't like", that is, she warns everyone that she likes only a certain type of boys. The boy warns that he likes a certain type of girls. In fact, in them there is fear — fear of love.

Such a child shows himself by showing his indifference to others. He still has time to wait, but the stress associated with the anticipation of love grows. Thus it scans and controls how it is treated by other children, especially if it is beautiful boys or girls, and becomes dependent on their evaluation. In this regard, he develops anxiety-hypochondriac syndrome. He shows neglect and indifference, won't let anybody in, and he dreams and dreams about love.

Because of the closeness, the child sees everywhere indifference to him. Now the world reflects it accordingly, and he internally starts to have pain. From neterpimost heartache is indifferent, does not manifest himself, does not develop fully, not growing up and closes even more. Now he believes that love him will ever happen.

Once it comes to love. At a certain age, another boy or another girl says, "I love you." But he cannot open, he is glad he waited, though not ideal, he wanted, dreamed, looking into my eyes, but now... He doesn't know what to do, he has no adequacy, no understanding of what to do, he is afraid of the pain I had experienced within himself.

This child is caring. Now, he or flatly refuses to relationships in fear of being cast or attacks another. If it's a girl, and she was approached by a boy, she begins to show neglect, indifference, showing that it is not interested in him. At the same time, she internally clings to him and suffers not knowing what to do and not being able to open up to others... posted

 

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Source: vk.com/club8166610?w=wall-8166610_181989