6 ways to charm any person as described in the security services



psychology professor Jack Shafer many years worked as a special agent of the FBI and other agents trained technicians influence and persuasion, which sometimes are impossible without the personal charm. According to him, there is a golden rule, using which it is possible to win over any man. And it sounds like this: « Get the interlocutor like myself ».

How to achieve this? Website brings 6 great tips Jack Shafer, he repeatedly tried to work and in life.



1. Take oshibkuKogda Jack Shafer starts to conduct a series of lectures at the new stream, he casually makes a mistake in the pronunciation of some words and allows students to correct themselves. "I pretend to be confused, thank them for their care and correct errors," - said Jack.

This method it uses to achieve three goals. Firstly, when the students of the teacher corrects the errors, it makes them feel more confident. Secondly, they are beginning to more freely communicate with a mentor. Third, they allow themselves to make mistakes.

This technique can be used to win over any man. mistaken, show your ideal, let people correct themselves. And they will be arranged for you


2. Talk to people about them samihMy is too busy and very few people are interested in that are found. But, in order to please the people, we need to sincerely interested in them.

"You have forged more friends in two months if you have a genuine interest in people, than two years trying to get them interested in himself." (Dale Carnegie)

«< When people talk about themselves, does not matter - in a personal conversation or in social networks, are utilized the same pleasure centers in the brain as delicious food or money ». (Robert Lee Holtz)

These two quotes show how important it is to talk to people about their business, to win their position. The interests of their family, biography, children, their views on that and other occasion, and gratitude, sometimes unconsciously, you provided.



3. Make a compliment from a third party Sometimes direct compliments sound too obsessive Many people are not ready to accept them, or uncomfortable. In such cases it is better to use a compliment from a third party.

For example, you want to ask the accountant Anna Ivanovna about a favor and screw up the following sentence: "Anna, by the way, the head of personnel said that you are the most conscientious worker of our company».

Not necessarily, of course, to praise some professional quality, and can be personal. For example, like this: "Anna Ivanovna, head of the personnel department still remembers your patty with onions, you brought a birthday».



4. Do not forget to posochuvstvovatKazhdomu man is nice to know that it carefully listen and share his emotions. Of course, if a person starts to tell that he had a bad day, do not moan, "What a mess, ah you bedolazhechka!" Especially if it's your boss.

It will suit the usual statements like: "Yes, you have today was a difficult day. It happens to everyone! "If a person says that he was able to cope with difficult, it can be summarized as follows:" It seems that today things you are fine. It's great! »

We have to convince the interlocutor that we share his feelings and understand it


5. Ask about odolzheniiZnamenity words of Benjamin Franklin: "Those who once made you good, again more willing to help you than the person you have helped yourself." This phenomenon is known as the effect of Benjamin Franklin. The man who has the courtesy to another person grows in his own eyes. That is, if you want to please a man, it is better not to do a favor to him, and ask him for a favor. Of course, do not abuse the requests for help.

As quipped the same Franklin, "Guests, like fish, begin to smell bad on the third day." The same can be said about people who are too often asked for favors.



6. Make the person himself pohvalilMezhdu usual compliments and flattery, very fine line, so best to make the interlocutor himself praised
The ability to make people praise himself - is aerobatics. Practice it, make people pleasing. And you will love it.



All of these tips will certainly not appeal to hypocrisy. We just want to help you to please other people and live with all the world.



Based on the book D. Shafer "Turn charm by the method of special services»



See also: 8 simple rules of communication, when you manipulate
20 golden rules of communicating with people

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