How to overcome "the phone shyness" Bashny.Net

Not so bad phone, his shyness malyuyutV interesting thing is that it can take many forms. For example, you can completely free to speak in front of hundreds of people, but feel uncomfortable when speaking to someone face to face. Or you may feel comfortable talking with someone face to face, but experience a real panic when trying to pick up the phone and call someone.

You belong to the latter of the above categories? The very prospect of somewhere to call, even in a pizza delivery service, fills your heart with fear and leads to a powerful release of cortisol, whereby you repeatedly put off a phone call?

If so, then the digital age to you - a great blessing. Phone usage for their intended purpose has decreased significantly, and replace the telephone conversation came a text message and e-mail.

However, a situation where you need it to talk on the phone, still arise, then "phone phobia" is becoming a serious obstacle to perform many vital tasks - such as writing to the doctor, for example, and also deprives you of the many possibilities (when you can not call potential employers).





What causes the "phone shyness?" Reasons "phone shy" there are about the same as people who suffer from it.

Maybe in your life was the situation when you get a lot of annoying phone calls from its second half. Maybe you have a lot of screaming on the phone, serving customers at work, and the thought of a telephone conversation you have become firmly associated with stress and negativity.

Reason "phone shyness» - it's the knowledge that you will be evaluated based solely on your voice, plus a lack of knowledge of what happens when a call will be answered h4> Whatever the the reason, the result is the same: telephone communication is minimized.

When we communicate with someone face to face, our gestures, our body language, and especially our facial expressions play an important role in communication, helping to explain what we want to say.

And on the phone we have to communicate only through a vote. And it can create a lot of stress: I remember everything, I want to say? Will I have to say very clearly? Do people understand what I'm trying to explain or learn?

This point is particularly relevant if your voice has something that you do not like or something that prevents others to understand you: you may unintelligible mumble, or vice versa, chatters too quickly. Maybe you have some sort of speech impediment or you speak too softly, making you look like a woman, or an immature teenager, when in fact you - an adult male.

This is compounded by the need to deal with the unknown. When you call, you have no idea about what is happening at the other end. Who will take up the phone? Will you get their voice mail? Can you call the phone of the person who is looking for? Will they listen to your requirements, or you have to constantly interrupt them?

Thus, the reason for the "phone shy" - is the knowledge that you will be evaluated based solely on your voice, plus a lack of knowledge of what happens when a call will be answered.

How to overcome the "phone shy" As with other types of shyness, timidity from the telephone there is no magic pill, but there are a few tricks to help successfully manage it.

Before zvonitChtoby calm nerves, perform tactical breathing. If you have sweaty hands, and pulse rate, even when you are viewing a number in the phonebook, the call to be sure to perform these or other relaxation exercises.

One such exercise - tactical breathing. This is a technique used by police and soldiers in order to quickly calm down and focus in the shooting, and "tactical" called because breath, exhale and breath-holding occurs with a 4-second clock frequency.





Here's how:

Perform a slow deep breath for 4 seconds. hold your breath for 4 seconds. Perform a slow exhale for 4 seconds. < / Fully exhale, do not inhale 4 seconds. Repeat this exercise to restore full control of the breath.
"The opening of the" your "script" should be written very carefully, because it may be the most difficult part of the call. As soon as you step over the line, nervousness started to fall. In the "accession" should tell who you call where and for what reason do it. For example:

"Hi, my name is Jared Smith, and last week I applied for your job. I decided to ask whether you have an opportunity to consider it »?

After you write the introductory part of the conversation, make a list of key points that you would like addressed during the conversation. Try to predict what the person on the other end may ask you and what you would like him to answer. Note the phone numbers and names, it may ask you. Make your "script" as much detail as possible. Most likely, you will not be able to read all the written word for word, but you will have a sense of confidence, and it will be easier to talk.

Rehearse. If you are very nervous, try to rehearse written earlier entry, before you call. Hold the phone at the ear, and speak into it to make a realistic rehearsal.

You can first call the person with whom you are comfortable communicating. Just before calling a stranger makes you nervous, contact the person does not cause you nervousness when communicating by telephone. For example, with a member of his family. And after a short conversation with him immediately dial the number of a stranger. This is a very effective method of suppressing shyness, because the first call calms the part of the mind, which is associated with stress phone.

During razgovoraHodite and gesticulate. Studies show that if you communicate, and your hand is something constrains (for example, you keep your hands in your pockets) then you get nervous a lot stronger. This is because you can not gesticulate, and, therefore, are not too sure that the person on the other end has correctly understood your words. So even if the person does not see your body language, gestures necessary anyway - just to feel more confident.

Smile. We often think that a smile - a reaction to the feeling of happiness and peace. In fact, she can create these feelings. Studies show that smile, demonstrated during stressful situations, even if it is totally insincere, reduces heart rate and the overall level of stress. In addition, the person on the other end you will seem warmer.

Look in the mirror at what you say. Anxiety during a telephone conversation arises partly from the fact that the only feedback you get - the voice of the other person. You do not see a face in it appears at the moment when you are talking about. Thus, viewing itself in a mirror can help to feel a little more comfortable. Instead of speaking into the void, you can trick your mind and make him think that you are talking face to face with another person, who also looks friendly and pretty attractive!

Practice. People with "phone shy" are often advised to get a job, which they will have to do a lot of phone calls. Regular practice can help to overcome the phobia, but it will take a lot of time. This might work, but there are cases where people are shy, get similar jobs started to communicate great for work reasons, but problems with the telephone conversations back as soon as they leave work.

The reason for this is that the role of the proposed work, as it separates man from himself. It almost seems that someone else is calling for you over the phone, so you just does not make sense to get nervous.

That is why regular practice of "independent" of calls can be much more effective. Set out to do during the day one phone call. The easiest way to do it - a daily phone calls to different organizations and ask about time, "Hi, I just wanted to know how much you're up close today».

One proposal, that's all. A work should be to ensure the proposals were more and that they were longer.

via www.artofmanliness.com/2015/03/12/how-to-overcome-phone-shyness/