James May on terrorism Bashny.Net

Several years ago, during the event, now known as the "tragedy of September 11," several terrorists armed with knives boarded several aircraft, pilots killed and rammed a couple of skyscrapers.
Therefore, at the airport I have confiscated nail clippers, which I wore on keychain with keys. After all, on the way to the United States I can overcome religious bigotry, and I death zaschiplyu crew "747", starting with nails.
Meanwhile, the real bad guys are sunk to the bombs, they wear boots. Once it is found, each time on the way to Manchester I have to take off shoes Dr.Martens, unlaced all 28 holes. So I blew fat people with laptops, flying to a conference on the future of plastics.
But it does not help enough terrorists. Because they have already developed two-component liquid explosives and camouflage it under the hair gel, which is used by Hammond, and things like that. And when I get to Heathrow with hand luggage only, every time I have taken a deodorant. And suddenly it's nerve gas, which I'm going to kill a team of sixth graders riding in the Frank-Furth on competition netball? But in fact, it discredits England: in fact, I paced the foreign country, stinking sweat.

Continued under the cut ...





From all this, I want to climb the wall. Because of anti-social behavior of several people I am suffering from the incredible inconvenience, and my well-regulated existence is flying to the devil.

The same is true in private life. Now with Oz Clarke, I'm doing a program about wine and the wine industry, and we have big problems. We risk to be promoters of alcoholism and incurring censorship Air Force or the Ministry of Health. Why is that? Because a couple of drunk vagrants and chews each other.

This is ridiculous. We say only that for the normal, balanced person is perfectly acceptable - drink a couple of glasses. And if by this he was slightly drunk, well, great! Everyone I know loves to drink. But none of my friends have not cut me with a knife and beaten on his way home from the pub, taking it all on video.

Yet ministers insist that the wine glasses need to be smaller, so we held off a terrible habit. Nonsense! We again have to suffer because of a handful of imbeciles, I would have sent to the mines.

And then I come to mind traffic management measures that have been taken near my home. New traffic lights, narrowing to a single row, high "speed bumps" silly roundabout, millions of cameras - the usual tedious rigmarole, of which did not want to get behind the wheel.

According to the majority of drivers, most of it is completely useless. We instinctively we go slowly and keep tabs on the top near the schools. Skip the bus going to stop at the entrance to the intersection. To give way to oncoming drivers on a narrow road, where two of them did not pass. We all stop at the red, not persecuted, hoping that somehow cost.

However, since some may not so, or rather do not want others - most! - Forced to endure endless interference in what should be a simple and enjoyable process. I think a few thousand spoiled the pleasure of driving the car the rest of the 30 million. I do not know, what can you do. I'm not worried about the pilots, who are torn, crawling, can not decide where to minimize or forget to include the turn signals. I am not against the drivers, all 800 km of highway snaking along the middle lane to the house trailer. I hate the one who mistreats machines, which I love, and drives like an idiot. If you do not like to drive a car, do not drive! Who other than trains and buses.

The problem of security at the airport is easier to solve - thanks to my friend Nigel. He is ready to sacrifice future career and even his life, wearing shorts of explosives. Perhaps he will be forced to explode. But then we are forced to take pants and put them in the X-ray machine.

It will be at least fun.

via topgearrussia

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